Why The Narcissist Cannot Tolerate You

They cannot deal with you effectively. They see you as something that is difficult to overcome. You disturb and distract them. You interfere with their normal arrangement. You prevent them from concentrating on something. Which irritates them. It makes them become nervous because of worry and fear that is difficult for them to control. Whenever there is a problem, they require quick and immediate action and attention from you. They require you to comfort them and make them feel better about themselves. Because they have an inability to do that on their own. They have difficulty managing their own lives. But they will never you that. When you express your individuality and you show them you're not the same. They don't know how to respond to that. So instead, they make you out to be this person who constitutes a problem. This person who is causing difficulty and is hard to deal with.

They will try to put you into their systematic plan or arrangement. But it really has nothing to do with you. This is about them and how they choose to respond to things. They don't know how to move beyond their immediate personal context. To allow themselves to look at things from a different perspective. They have a fixed mentality. They have a hidden agenda It's their way or the highway. They have to preside over you. Which leaves no space for difference in expression, meaning or response. Because there's just no way to get through to them. They will criticise you. They will blame you. Because everything has to be done their way. They can't tolerate any other alternatives. Because they've already made a decision. And they expect you to go along with it. They cannot share your ideas and opinions. They cannot work with you as a team. They cannot blend with you.

Narcissists lack self awareness. They're more focused on protecting their false image. Which is why can't accept accountability. They can't accept that there's things they need to change or improve. They can't accept that they don't know everything. Which leaves them to be unreliable. You can't depend on them for anything. Because if there is a difference or a problem, something has to be wrong with you. You must be the one who is at fault. Because they hold such strong beliefs of who they are. They have to be informed. They have to be aware of everything. They have to have access to all of the information about something, which other people don't have. Because they can't accept that they really don't know anything. They lack conscious knowledge of their own character and feelings. And that is why they cannot tolerate you.

They cannot collaborate with you. They cannot accept that you have your own ideas and opinions. Because they lack empathy. They cannot share your feelings. They cannot put themselves in your shoes. So they expect you to comply with their usual standards and expectations. Your individuality confuses them. It distracts them and impairs their confidence and concentration. But they refuse to explore who you are or your previous life and experiences. They lack the desire to know or learn anything about you. Unless it's something they can use to support their narrative of you. They're intimidated by your power and right to act, speak and think as you want. By your power to make your own choices and decisions. So they will try to make you ineffective by applying an opposite force and effect. Because it overwhelms them. It intimidates them.

It makes them feel small in comparison to you. So they will try to bring it down. They will try to preside over you. They will try to conquer you. They're not going to be grateful or thankful for your distinctive qualities. They're not going to recognise the worth or importance of it. Because they lack self awareness. They lack conscious knowledge of their own character and feelings. And there's nothing you can say to sway them. There's nothing you can do to make them see sense. And it's not your job to do that. You're only responsible for yourself. But you do know how to allow the existence, occurrence and practice of things that you dislike or disagree with. You do know how to deal effectively with difficult things. Because you know and understand yourself very well. And you don't have to give up on yourself just to please someone else.

You can celebrate everything that makes you special and unique. And if they don't like it, that's their loss. That's their foolish mistake. That's something they are responsible for. It's not something that you should worry about or get involved in. Instead, you should focus on peace and love. Being welcoming and embracing. And creating an environment where people can feel comfortable and confident to be themselves. Because that type of attitude and perspective produces good results. But the narcissist will remain stuck in their ways. They will remain unwilling to change their way of doing and thinking about things. Which will not have positive results. But you are not responsible for that. That's just how they choose to be.