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Writer's pictureNarc Survivor

When The Narcissist Sees You're Not Weak

Narcissists target people who feed their ego. People who validate them. People who give them attention. People who don't do that will not get involved with the narcissist. People who do will become their source of supply. Narcissists don't deliberately target people who are strong. They usually seek people who they think are weak. People who are too kind and naive. People who are vulnerable. People who are too afraid to stand up for themselves. And at one point, that may have been you. Until you gradually became a threat to the narcissist. Because you were no longer under their spell. You were no longer under their control. You became more aware. You became more wise. You became confident. Because you started to realise your own worth.


Which threatened the narcissist. But that doesn't mean they're going to stop. They will still try to lower your self-esteem. Or they will try to lovebomb you again. Because that is how they gain control of you. But if that doesn't work, they will play the victim. They will try to gain your sympathy. They don't care what you think of them. They don't care if you feel sorry for them. Or if you see them as being helpless. They just need something they can use to increase their effectiveness. To improve their chances of success. They need your attention. They need to keep you engaged. They need to be important to you. So if you're not susceptible to their lovebombing, they will try to make you feel sorry for them.





They will try to gain your sympathy. They will play the role of this damsel in distress. As though they're in trouble and they need your help. As though only you can help them. They will act humble to gain your trust and support. But if you let your guard down, they will destroy you. They're not going to appreciate anything you've done to help them. Because they're entitled. They believe the world owes them. So they're not going to feel any remorse. Instead, they're going to feel like they're this top dog who has conquered you. They're going to feel powerful. They're going to feel superior to you. And once they've churned out as much as they can get from you, they will discard you. But if you manage to catch on to what they're doing, before they get the chance to do that. They will turn the tables on you.


When the narcissist sees that you're strong, they will label you as the abuser. They may even call you a narcissist. They will play the victim. And then they will tell everyone that they suffered at your hands. They will start a smear campaign. They will tell anyone who will listen to them. Anyone who will fall for their lies. They will use those people to gain access to your life. And then they will turn them against you. They want to isolate you. They want everyone to hate you. Because that is how they get attention from other people. And they want people to feel the same way about you as they do.


They want people to see you as a threat. So they will gossip about you. They will spread rumours. They will make false accusations. They will say anything to paint you in a bad light. So that everyone sees you the same way. Until it begins to affect your life. Because now you can't even go to work without people talking about you. And that's exactly what they want. Because they're jealous of you. They hate that you are liked and admired by many people. Because they feel like that's taking something away from them. So they will try to find ways to bring you down. To make people turn against you. They will try to steal the spotlight away from you. Because they always have to be the center of attention.





They want everything to revolve around them. So they will establish a commanding position over you. They will manipulate you. They will cheat, lie and steal. Because they hate your success. They believe that you are better than them. And they can't stand it. Because no matter what they achieve, they know it's fake. They know they had to manipulate people to get it. They know they had to act dishonestly. But your success came to you naturally. You didn't have to trick anyone. You didn't have to create a false character. You could just be yourself. You could be real and genuine. And that is why they hate your qualities and characteristics. Because they secretly desire to have them.


So they will try to take those things from you. And then they will try to ruin you. When they see you're not weak, they will try to lovebomb you. If that doesn't work, they will play the victim. And if that doesn't work, they will act dishonestly. They will start a smear campaign. They will enforce their flying monkeys. No matter how strong you become, the narcissist will always have another trick up their sleeve. They may not target you directly. But they will find other means. No matter how far you advance, they will still try to pull you down.

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Unknown member
Nov 09, 2022

It amazing to hear everyone classify us empaths are weak and vulnerable. Sure, we wear our hearts on ourselves. This is what drove me along with child trauma look for an equal and kind soul like myself. However, I realized everyone was taken advantage me at some point and I fought back now I give them what they deserve out front. It takes a toll on my body to be angry and cause vengeance on others darn I will say they are the weak ones NOT US.

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carlyworks555
carlyworks555
Nov 09, 2022
Replying to

I know exactly what you mean. I found out that when I get angry that it actually makes me sick physically. If I act out on my anger and I let the words come out that I want to say, I know it's going to hurt the other person because we always know what's going to hurt the other person. Afterwards, I can have a fever the whole next day and I feel sick the whole next day. That's why I try never to get really angry. It only happens about once a year now. Interesting how we can sit with someone who is broken and crying for hours and give them our open hearts. But, when we give someone…

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carlyworks555
carlyworks555
Nov 09, 2022

With the way that the world is now, there seems to be more and more narcissistic behavior. What is someone supposed to do who values honesty and trust and the small things in life. Sounds like a needle in a haystack situation. But, there's always hope. Thank you for writing this, Christopher. Carly

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