When you're trying to leave the narcissist, they become desperate. They become reckless and dangerous because of despair and urgency. They become very unpredictable. So you never know what they're going to do. They may start an argument. So that it leads to a fight. And then they will call the police on you. They may steal your money and possessions. And they may not even tell you that they know you're thinking about leaving. They will just start sabotaging you. They will make it difficult for you to leave. So you may have thought you had the advantage over them, by deciding to leave them first. But they already knew what you were planning to do. So they turned the tables on you. They reversed the situation and gained the upper hand. By stealing your stuff. And leaving you before you got the chance to leave them. Because you kept complaining to them. You kept telling them all of the things you didn't like. So they know it was game over.
They knew it was time to do you in. They knew it was time to cause serious problems for you. And that is why many of you may have been caught up in the law. You may have dealt with court cases. You may have been arrested. You may have spent time in prison. Because you wanted to show them you were done with them. You were planning to get rid of them. Which is why that is not the right way to leave the narcissist. You will never win by doing it that way. Because they will sabotage your progress. They will talk about you to other people. They will discredit you. They will smear your name. They will start a smear campaign. They will report you at your job. Because they lost their grip on you. They lost control of you. So they're not going to let you go without suffering any punishment or injury. They're not going to let you get away with it. They will show a skilful use of underhand tactics to achieve their objectives.
They will act dishonestly. And you may never see it coming. Because they may have seem lazy and unmotivated while they were with you. But now they're pulling out all the stops.
They're making every possible effort and using all of their available resources, to get what they want from you. The narcissist will try to provoke you into an argument, to see where you are in the mind. Because they know that something has changed. They can recognise when you're acting differently. So they will start an argument with you, to see how you react to them. And if you get mad and you tell them that you're planning to leave them, you've already blown your cover. Now they already know what you're planning to do. And now they're going to foil your plans.
They're going to make it difficult for you. Because you gave yourself away. They noticed changes in your behaviour. Which is why you need to act uninterested. You need to avoid showing any strong emotion. Because they're very sensitive to any changes in the environment. They will pick up on it. And they will respond to it. They will sabotage whatever you're planning to do. Which is why the only way to win is to leave when they're unaware of it. So that they don't have time to act in opposition to you. You should never try to leave when they're already aware of your plans. It will set you up for failure. You should wait until they're away. Because they will fight you. It may even become physical.
They will make the greatest possible effort to prevent you from leaving. So don't let your emotions control your actions. Don't even confront them. You can do that after you're gone. Until that time, you should be silent. Because otherwise they will know that you're planning to leave them. They will sense it. And when you're gone, you shouldn't let them know where you are. You shouldn't give them any clue to your whereabouts. Because that would make all of your efforts pointless. It puts you in a stronger position when they don't know your location. Because they're not going to go to great lengths just to track you down. So if you move to a different area and you change your social media and phone numbers. It's going to make it very difficult for them. Because when you leave, a lot of them will try to stalk you.
When you've finally left the narcissist, you should not look back. You should not have any regrets. You should not question if you've made the right decision. Don't gaslight yourself. Remember what you went through. They were not the right person for you. You never felt peace with them. You always had to deal with something. There was so many arguments. Because they like it when you're feeling down. They don't care if it affects your work performance. They like to see that. Which is why you've made the right decision by leaving them. Because that's just no way to live.
They were always complaining about something. They could never be happy with anything. And it just became negative and boring after a while. Because life is too short. There are better uses of your time. You forgot how to be happy. You forgot to enjoy your life. Because it rubbed off on you. You became miserable just like them. Which is why you planned to leave. Which is why you wanted to get out of it. But once you decide to leave, you should not look back. Because it's never going to get better. They're always going to be this way. The only way to win with the narcissist is to leave as quickly as possible.
What you wrote is very true. It can be dangerous if you tell the narcissists that you're going to leave them. There are many ways they could sabotage you. And, they will talk to everyone that you know and make up stories so that they look good and you look terrible. But, the opposite is just as true. The narcissist has a lot to worry about when their supply decides to leave them. If that person isn't truly an empath and a very nice and good person, they could destroy the narcissist's life. They could interfere at their place of work. They could tell everyone that knows him all of the secrets of his infidelities and his indiscretions. I fee…