Predatory Narcissists Work Together. This may sound like something out of some sick horror movie, but this is exactly how it takes place in real life. Narcissists will often work together with their family members or friends to trap you into an abusive situation. They will introduce you to their family members or friends. And at first everything seems normal, they seem friendly, they seem to like you. But over time, red flags will begin to reveal themselves.
You start to see that this personality or attitude they were displaying to you was completely fake. It's not really what they were about, they just used this to mirror you or appeal to your own ideals. This was designed to lure you into an abusive environment. We often overlook the red flags and want to see them as good people. We don't want to assume that they are trying to objectify us and use us for an abusive purpose. We especially don't want to think that this was all premeditated. But that's the sick thing about this. It was premeditated.
When the narcissist introduced you to their family members or friends, they already knew exactly what was going to happen. They knew what they were going to do to you, what they were going to use you for. They knew the effects that this was going to have on your psychological, emotional and even physical health. They were well aware of all of this from the first time they met you. The family members and friends knew exactly what to do, exactly how to play their part or their role. The fact that the family members or friends knew exactly what to do in this abusive situation, should tell you that they have done this before. They already knew exactly what was going to happen.
They have seen this type of situation play out before, so naturally they already know what is going to come out of it. You were being groomed into being with the narcissist. You were being prepared or trained for a particular purpose or activity. An abusive purpose. The family member's or the friend's job in this situation was to manipulate you or coerce you into this experiencing this kind of behaviour or environment. This was the practice of forcing you to act in an involuntary manner by use of threats or force. Involving various types of forceful actions that violate your free will to induce a desired response.
They are basically using your body, mind and soul as an object or a tool as extract whatever reaction or energy they desire from you in that moment. And this is going against your free will. You don't realise at first that you are being involved or being used for this type of purpose. But that's exactly what is going on and the family members or friends are fully aware of it. They already know what your purpose is in this relationship. They know what you are going to be used for. But they won't even mention anything that has happened prior to this experience.
They will make it seem as though it's just here and now. Nothing has ever happened prior to this. And that's just how dysfunctionality operates in these types of environments. It has to be denied or ignored for it to exist. Dysfunctionality cannot exist in an environment where there is acknowledgement or responsibility and accountability. These types of people live in denial, they live in ignorance. That's how their dysfunctionality manages to survive for such long periods of time and nothing ever gets resolved.
When their abusive or manipulative nature is finally revealed to you. They will make you believe that this is just out of character for them, it's not what they normally do. They will even gaslight you and make you think that something is wrong with you or you are going crazy. They will even blame you for their own dysfunctional behaviours as though it's something you have caused. And this is why they can never bring up the past, they can never bring up situations with other people. Because then you would see that this is in their character, this is their true personality.
This is something they have been doing their entire lives with many other people before you. It may not have taken place in the exact same way, but you can be sure that it did take place in a different form. And this is something that they have practiced and perfected over time up until now where you see the complete result of years of predatory and abusive behaviour. This isn't something they just magically learned upon meeting you.
This is something they have been doing their entire lives, with many other individuals, just in different forms. And they have learned to adapt or adjust their behaviour to tailor make the abuse and target specific people. The family members or friends will create a false sense of acceptance, as though you are welcome there. They will talk to you, compliment you, they might even buy you stuff.
And while this is what you are seeing on the surface from them, under the radar they are doing all kinds of covert manipulation tactics to gradually destroy your self worth and self esteem. You may not catch on to this at first due to the false sense of acceptance. It may create cognitive dissonance, two conflicting beliefs within your mind. On the surface it seems as though they are loving and caring people, but then they are covertly putting you down or giving you back handed compliments. Making you feel as though you are not good enough or something is wrong with you. That's when you begin to realise that these people are not who they say they are.
What they are saying they are about, they are not really about that at all. You may decide to confront the family members or friends and that's when you will start to see another side of them. You will start to see who they really are. And then it becomes clear that they were working together all along. They worked together in the beginning to groom you into becoming this source of supply for them. They then extracted as much as they could out of you before you caught on and confronted them about it. And then when you finally confront them they are working together to gaslight you or blame you for whatever it is that you are confronting them about.
This is when the dysfunctionality moves from covert to overt. This is when you realise that you are the only normal person in this environment. You are the only person who actually meant what they said from the beginning, the only person who was actually about any of that. But all along they made you believe that's what they were about. While covertly displaying that it was you who was different or wrong.
The entire time you were witnessing this false display of authenticity, without ever looking at yourself and realising that you were exactly what they were pretending to be. But they made you believe that they were about that. And they even made their attempts at targeting your self worth and self esteem. It's because they already knew that they were not real or authentic, they already knew that they were not truthful about anything they said. But they looked at you and they could see that you were really about that, you were genuine. And by the end of it, you realised that you were the only genuine, authentic person in that situation.
So naturally they felt compelled to target your self worth and self esteem. All of these great qualities which you possessed were a threat to their false selves. It triggered the family members or friends to reflect on themselves and their own faults, mistakes, flaws or imperfections. And this is why they felt so compelled to target your self worth and self esteem. They have an inferiority complex. They knew what was going to happen right from the first meeting. They knew what the plan was, they knew that they were going to completely dissect you apart. They knew that they were going to use covert manipulation tactics to target your self worth and self esteem.
They knew that they were going to erase you, re-create you to their liking and then blame you for their own creation. This was the plan all along. You were not just the narcissist's source of supply, you were also the family member's or friend's source of supply too. And they were all taking turns to use you to extract their narcissistic supply. And as sick as it sounds, they enjoy it, it's a source of entertainment. They knew exactly what they were going to do, they weren't thinking much about the consequences. But right from the first meeting they knew exactly what they were going to use you for.
And although they completely objectified you and used you as a source of their own satisfaction. They understand that you are a living, breathing human being. They understand that you have feelings and that there were real consequences, real effects to your psychological, emotional and even physical health from what they were doing to you. It wouldn't be much fun if they didn't fully understand that you were a living, breathing human with real emotions.
That's what gives them that sadistic kick which makes them feel alive. It's knowing that you are feeling, you are experiencing everything that they are saying, everything that they are doing to you. Without that, there would be no narcissistic supply. But although they understand that you are a living, breathing human. They see you as an object, because in their minds you are designed to serve them. You are there for them to extract attention, validation, approval and admiration whenever they desire. You are there to give them a sense of power and control over you and the situation. You are there for them to hurt and destroy, just to make them feel alive.
Whatever you have, whatever you do, whatever you feel, it reflects on their perception of what they have, do or feel. If you have high self esteem or self worth, it reflects on their perception of their self esteem or self worth. So they will give you put downs or backhanded compliments to target that. If you are doing something which you enjoy and it is providing you with satisfaction or fulfilment. It is going to affect their level of satisfaction or fulfilment. If you feel positive emotions, you feel happy or joyful. It is going to make them feel miserable.