Narcissists Are Dependent On You. Narcissists may act like they are independent, but they are actually dependent on you. They require your time and energy. They are dependent on your attention, validation and admiration of them. They may be dependent on you emotionally, physically or financially. Furthermore, they cannot attend to themselves or validate themselves. They cannot regulate their own emotions. They will use to regulate their emotions.
I have done a video called "Narcissists Are Dependent On Your Reaction". They use your reactions to regulate their emotions and give them a sense of power and control. But they cannot do any of this on their own, they are heavily dependent on you. This is why when you don't do what they want you to do or if you don't conform to the way that they have programmed you to be, they get angry or become passive-aggressive towards you.
They have to constantly gaslight you and reinforce their programming, so that you will see them, other people and the world in the way that they do, or in the way that they want you to see it. This is for the narcissist's security. They want to ensure that their supply is free from danger or threat, so that it can continue to provide them with everything they need. When you do or say something that is not in line with the narcissist's programming or if you have a separate idea or belief to what the narcissist wants you to believe, that is a potential danger or threat to their supply.
You are not supposed to have your own thoughts, feelings or beliefs. The narcissist expects you to think, feel and believe whatever they program you to think, feel and believe. It keeps you in a box, it makes your actions and behaviors more predictable, and then makes it easier for them to control you. For them to control you, your world must revolve around them. They need to be able to control you because they are heavily dependent on you. Some narcissists may be financially independent.
The reason why they were able to achieve this level of success is because they are self-absorbed and lack empathy. They take the time that should be spent on caring for the people around them and use it for their own benefit. They also do not mind stepping on people, if it helps them to succeed. Narcissists are dependent on you, and they want you to be dependent on them. They want you to be dependent on them so that no outside sources could influence you or take the narcissist's time when they need you.
If you start interacting with other people or seeking something from another person, that person could influence you and counteract the narcissist's programming. If you are interacting with people outside the narcissist's world, they could influence you to see the narcissist in a completely different way.
You might start to realize that you deserve so much better, or you do not deserve to be treated that way by the narcissist. You might realize that you are being abused, or you are the victim of mind control. Narcissists are also deeply envious of any human interaction or stimulation you might receive from outside sources, as they are envious of your happiness and contentment, and jealous of anyone who you may potentially come into contact with. They are jealous because they feel as though someone is taking their supply away.
They feel as though their pet is escaping. You are their source of supply, your job is to regulate their self-esteem and their emotions. You're not supposed to be going out and having your own friends or your own interests. Your life is meant to revolve around the narcissist, so that you can provide them with whatever they need at that moment. In the narcissist's mind, you shouldn't need anyone else. You should be dependent on them, even though they don't bring anything to the table to nourish or replenish you.
They have this exaggerated sense of value or importance. They will highly exaggerate the value of the item or favor given to you. Not only that, but they have this grandiose mentality as though, if they give something to you or give something to you, it automatically has more value than if someone else were to do that. Whatever they want you to be dependent on them for, you will only receive the bare minimum of that, or it will just be an illusion. They will often future fake and make you believe that one day they will reward you for your efforts, but you will never see the fruits of your labor.
They want you to be dependent on them, but not for any reason that is beneficial for you. It's just to keep you around, so they can get whatever they need from you. A narcissist will not even take the time out of their day for someone, unless they believe that they can get something out of it. When a narcissist is dependent on you, they will ensure that they always get what they want. But when they make you dependent on them, you will never get what you want, even though they have made you dependent on them for that.
You will always be more of a benefit to them, than they are to you. You won't get what you want from the narcissist because they don't like to give, they prefer to take. When they give, they feel jealous of the person they are giving to, as though that person is taking something from them. They are also envious of the happiness and contentment that person will experience from whatever they are giving them. This is why you will notice that a narcissist might give something or do something for you and then immediately say or do something to ruin it.
It's because they were envious of the happiness and contentment you were experiencing from whatever they gave or did for you. Another reason why narcissists don't like to give is because if they did give you what you want, you would realize that it's not that great anyway. You would realize that the narcissist is not this amazing person they made themselves out to be. But if they continue to withhold from you, it keeps the fantasy going. It keeps you wondering and imagining how noteworthy this person is and how much they have to offer, even when they haven't given you anything.
The narcissist knows that if they did give you something or do something for you, you would quickly realize that they are lacking the qualities or capabilities which they suggested initially. This would then cause a narcissistic injury, as you would no longer see them the way that they want to be seen, and they would feel like you are rejecting them or what they have to offer. Narcissists usually target people who are independent, people who are empaths. If you are an empath, you prefer to give.
Narcissists are aware of this and this is one of the reasons why they targeted you. They knew that they could take whatever they want from you, and you wouldn't expect anything from them in return. Even if you did start asking them for a return on your investment, they would twist it around and act as though you are needy, you shouldn't want that from them, or you are expecting too much.
They will only give you something or do something for you if they feel as though you are waking up to what they are doing or if you start confronting them. Or if they want to obtain supply from other people by giving you something or doing something for you, if it will make them look good. Narcissists may act as though you always need something from them or you are dependent on them. But they never give you what you are supposed to be dependent on them for. They are dependent on you, they require your time and energy and everything that you have to offer.
They will try to isolate you so that your life revolves around them. This is designed to ensure that their supply is free from danger or threat. They don't want anyone to take their supply from them. They want to make your world as small as possible so that they can control everything that happens and prevent you from sharing your time and energy with someone else. That would be very unbeneficial for them. It could risk them being exposed, and it could also risk you finally realizing that the narcissist basically ain't about shit and has been lying to you about their qualities and abilities the entire time.
But now you have this valuable information, you know what the narcissist is really about. I hope that you will use this information to help you. Go no contact with this person who isn't going to benefit you in any way, take some time to heal and then find someone who will give you what you are looking for. Relationships require fairness, it should be about understanding and working towards the needs of the relationship and not just the needs of one person. I hope that this video has provided you with further knowledge and understanding of your situation.