Guided Meditation-Closure From Your Relationship With The Narcissist


This is a guided meditation designed to assist you in your healing. Find a comfortable position, either sitting or lying down. Please do not listen to this guided meditation while driving or operating machinery, as this can be dangerous. Use this guided meditation only when it is safe to do so. Let's begin with a breathing awareness exercise. This will help you to relax and stop you from ruminating on distracting thoughts. Throughout this breathing exercise, breathe in for four seconds, hold for three seconds, and then exhale for five seconds.

1.

Breathe in


[count four seconds]


Hold


[count three seconds]


Exhale


[count five seconds]


2.

Breathe in


[count four seconds]


Hold


[count three seconds]


Exhale


[count five seconds]


3.

Breathe in


[count four seconds]


Hold


[count three seconds]


Exhale


[count five seconds]


4.

Breathe in


[count four seconds]


Hold


[count three seconds]


Exhale


[count five seconds]


Continue to breathe at this slow pace.


Now as you relax, you can count your breaths as they continue to flow gently. Notice how calm and relaxed you are. See how regular your breathing has become. How calm your breathing is. Continue to take calm breaths as you focus on relaxing your body. Notice how each area of your body I mention relaxes as soon as you hear the word "relax".


Focus on your feet... relax.


Lower legs... relax.


Upper legs... relax.


Hips... relax.


Abdomen... relax.


Back... relax.


Chest... relax.


Shoulders... relax.


Arms... relax.


Hands... relax.


Face... relax.


Head... relax.


Scan your body now for any remaining areas of tension. Focus your attention on these areas, relaxing them more and more. Now that your body has started to become relaxed, let's talk about it. At the beginning of the relationship, they led you to believe that they appreciated your time and effort. Later into the relationship, they led you to believe that they loved you. They led you to believe that they cared about you. But they never loved you. They never really cared about you. And I know it hurts. It hurts to think that someone could make you believe something that is not true. It hurts to think that someone could take advantage of you. They abused you. They manipulated you. They distorted your reality. And in the end, you were left hurt and alone. While they appeared to move on so easily, as though you meant nothing to them. They used you for the attention you gave to them. The validation. Your energy. Narcissistic supply. They never really appreciated you. Because they were not capable of seeing just how valuable you truly are. How beautiful you truly are, inside and out. They were not capable of seeing your wonderful qualities. So once they used up all of your life and energy, you were of no use to them. The only way they could get any more life or energy from you was to abuse and manipulate you. To obtain a negative narcissistic supply. I am so sorry for your pain. I am so sorry for your suffering. You didn't deserve it. You deserved to be treated with love and respect. They were not capable of giving you the love and respect you craved. But you can learn to love and respect yourself. The love and respect you once gave to them you can give it to yourself. You believed that they had the missing piece to your puzzle. But the truth is, the missing piece to your puzzle has always been within you. It is the love and respect you chose to give to them. The love and respect which they could never reciprocate. Now you can give that to yourself. Now you can heal the pain. Now you can complete yourself.



Return your focus and awareness to your breathing. With each breath in, say in your mind, "breathe." With each breath out, say in your mind, "relax." Allow these words to relax you fully, each time you hear them, allow your body and mind to become even more relaxed and calm. Let these relaxing cue words fill your mind.


Breathe


[count 7 seconds]


Relax


Breathe


[count 7 seconds]


Relax



Breathe


[count 7 seconds]


Relax



Breathe


[count 7 seconds]


Relax



Breathe


[count 7 seconds]


Relax



You are now completely relaxed, comfortable, at peace. Observe this feeling of relaxation. Memorize it. Notice how calm you are. Notice how your breathing is slow and regular, pleasant, peaceful. Keep with you this feeling of relaxation. Now take a few moments to think about the pain you have experienced. Observe the pain that you feel or have felt. The way that you feel is different from moment to moment. A moment from now, you will feel different from the way you feel right now. Just observe how you are feeling at this moment. And observe how each moment passes. Accept your pain. Accept your thoughts. Accept your feelings. Yes, you are accepting and observing your pain. You are accepting and observing your thoughts. You are accepting and observing your feelings. Now let's state some affirmations. You may want to repeat these affirmations in your mind, as I am speaking them.


I accept myself. I accept this pain. All of it. I accept it. I am letting go of the need to control or to change at this moment. I accept myself. I accept the pain. I release myself from the need to do anything right now, except just be. Accepting and observing. I accept myself. I accept the pain. Now that you have repeated these affirmations, just relax for a few moments. Let go, and just be. You do not need to do anything else at this moment. Just accept this moment. Relax. Relax. Relax. Observe your pain again. And notice, that in this moment of acceptance and observation, you can alter the pain slightly. You can heal, you can recover.


Imagine a slightly different feeling of your choice. You may wish to imagine the sensation of pleasant tingling. Warm, soft, but firm, comfortable pressure. Imagine this new sensation replacing the pain. Feel this new sensation growing pleasantly, allowing you to relax and providing some relief. Now return your focus to your breath. Breathe in deeply, hold, and exhale. Notice how your body and mind feel now. Your muscles feel so relaxed. You feel at peace. Your mind feels so calm. Enjoy this feeling of relaxation. Memorize this feeling of peace and relaxation, so you can return to this state whenever you need to. Allow this feeling of relaxation to stay with you as you prepare to fall asleep. When you wake up, you will feel energized and refreshed. I am going to leave you to enjoy the sounds of this meditation. The music nourishes and heals your mind, body, and soul. It relaxes and gently guides you into a deep sleep.

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