When the relationship ends, the narcissist becomes unduly concerned with trivial matters. Things that are of little value and importance. They become small-minded and spiteful. They show rigid opinions and a narrow outlook. They become very mean. They hold grudges. They become very bitter and resentful towards you. Because they believe that they have been treated unfairly. Because they did everything they could to not fail. To not experience a lack of success. So when the relationship comes to an end, they get very angry. Because despite everything you did for them, they were very ungrateful. Which is why they become so bitter and resentful at the end of the relationship. But not like a normal person. After you have been dealing with the narcissist and they have exploited you, you may also experience resentment. And you may feel upset about everything you have lost. But with the narcissist, it eats away at them. It has a dramatic effect on them. Because when they targeted you, they targeted you based on your good qualities. There must have been something good about you.
Otherwise the narcissist wouldn't have wanted anything to do with you. So they targeted you. They got what they wanted out of you. But then when they lose you, they don't know how to deal with that. They don't know how to deal with failure. The purpose of them controlling their environment is so that they don't have to deal with failure. Because they cannot deal with the emotions that come along with that. So when they do fail. When they do lose you. They hold on to you. They become bitter. They get angry. They become very resentful. But then they will act like they've moved on and they're happy without you. When it's really just another part of the illusion. It's the lovebombing phase all over again. Only now, you're seeing it from the outside. Because this time, they're using it to hurt you. But beneath the facade, the reality is that no narcissist is ever happy. The reason they act that way is because they're constantly in pain. It's because their unhappy and unfulfilled. That's what fuels their disorder. They're envious and jealous of you. Because they're dissatisfied with their lives. So they're never happy. Because they always feel like they lack something. When the relationship ends, they will try to replace you. But it's not so easy for them to find someone who is as good as you are. Which is why they become so bitter when they lose you. Because they know they're not going to find someone as good as you. And it just eats away at them. They become self-destructive. And it may even affect the people around them. They become bitter to other people. Anyone who gets in their way becomes a victim of circumstance. Because there is something going on inside of them. They're not happy. When you throw away your garbage, you don't care about where it's going. You don't care about what happens to it. But if you threw away something of value. It's going to affect you. You're going to be chasing after that item. You're going to want it back. But if you can't get it back, it will hurt you. It will have an effect on you. Because even if you tried to replace it, it's not going to be the same. It's not going to have that sentimental value. So when they do lose you, they're going to feel regret. They're going to experience disappointment. Because they get hurt easily. It doesn't take much to affect them. And they're always putting themselves in situations where they're destined to fail. Which inevitably causes them to build up failure after failure. But they never take accountability for where they find themselves. They blame everyone else. They attack everyone. Because they're very unfulfilled people. And they don't know how to correct the situation. They don't make the neccessary changes.
So they repeat the same mistakes again and again. While expecting to get a different result. Because they're very delusional. They lie to themselves so that they can escape reality. They put themselves in a fictitious state of being, so that they can mask and medicate the real issue of what is wrong with them. So they might say that they're doing great. They might say that they're happy. But really, they're miserable. Narcissists are never happy. They never feel at peace with themselves. There's always something going on in their minds. There's always something preventing them from being at rest. Which is why they always want to keep you on edge. They always want to keep you off-balance. Because whenever they see you in a state of peace and harmony, they get very envious and jealous. Because they can't experience that. They're very bitter and resentful people. Which is why they contaminate and corrupt anything that they come into contact with. Which is why you feel like you can't escape their negative energy. Because they need access to you all the time. They need a positive person there to filter out all of the garbage. Without a positive person there to do that, they would break down. Because to get rid of all of their toxicity, they need to have a victim. They can't deal with it on their own. They don't want to deal with it. They don't want to go back and clean up all of the mess they've made over the last 20 or 30 years. Because they've got a mountain of garbage. They don't want to deal with having to clean it up. They would rather just lay in their own filth. And then bring other people into it and expect them to put up with it. Because once you have been around them long enough, eventually you will become toxic. They're never going to change. They like their disorder. They like the way it operates. If they didn't have it, they wouldn't know where to start. They wouldn't know how to live. They wouldn't know what to do. They would probably go insane. Once you've identified that you are dealing with a narcissist, you need to move away from them. You need to move to a healthier place. Because if you're constantly engaging with someone who is bitter, resentful and petty, eventually it will have an effect on you.
You will begin to operate primarily from that same type of energy. You will experience anxiety and depression. You will experience dissatisfaction with life, just as they do. Because as long as you're around them, all they're going to do is blame you for their difficulties and failures. Because they are trapped in a prison of their own making. And accountability is the only thing that will set them free. But they choose to run from the difficulties and problems that they have created. Which is why they cannot change the situation. Because they are completely delusional. You cannot reach them. Because every time you try to bring logic to the situation, they're twisting it in their minds. They're interpreting it in a different way. Because they're in a state of illusion. And illusions will always beat strength and determination. Fantasies can be very powerful once you start to believe in them. But when the relationship ends and they're brought back to reality. Their bitterness and resentment just ends up destroying them. But they don't understand why. Instead, they would rather point the finger at everyone else. Which is the very thing which just ends up destroying them in the end.