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Writer's pictureNarc Survivor

The Obsessed Flying Monkeys


A flying monkey can be anyone who believes the fake persona of the narcissist. They act on behalf of the narcissist, usually for an abusive purpose. They can also be enablers, as they enable the abuse to take place, by keeping a code of silence. Normal emotionally healthy people do not abuse or manipulate. They do not get involved in someone else's business. Flying monkeys do and they take it personally even though it has nothing to do with them. Flying monkeys will spy on you. They will spread gossip and paint a negative picture of you. The more overt types will even threaten you and paint the narcissist as a victim. They can make it seem as though the narcissist isn't really involved. They are likely to have no idea that they are being used. They feel as though they are accepted as a part of a group. And this is part of why they do what they do. It gives them a sense of belonging. Flying monkeys are stalkers. Stalkers have mental disorders. Many of them are narcissistic, psychopathic or some other cluster B disorder. Flying monkeys work together to abuse and manipulate their victims. They engage in acts of exploitation and public humiliation.



It is a sick, twisted source of entertainment for them. They all know exactly what is going on, they are all self absorbed and lack empathy. They all secretly hate each other, but they will bond over your destruction, because they all have a lot in common. They are all pathologically envious and jealous of you. They are all insecure and have an inferiority complex. They all have low self worth and self esteem. Dysfunctionality always sticks together. They bond over manipulating you, using tactics like denial, projection, blame shifting, gaslighting and the double bind. Making you think that you are not good enough, you are crazy or something is wrong with you. Secretly knowing that there is something deeply wrong with them. Which is another reason why they do what they do. They are running from themselves, trying to escape reality. Because in reality they are predatory abusers, they are gaslighters. They are doing everything they can to avoid reflecting on this fact. This is why they will devalue and degrade you. And try to make you believe that something is wrong with you or you are crazy, so that they can take the focus of themselves. They are doing everything they can to dodge the shame. Their way of justifying the abuse is to blame it on something you have done in your past. But what they do to you is never reasonable for what they claim you have done. Flying monkeys do not have sound judgement, they are not fair or sensible. What they do is not fair, appropriate or moderate in any sense. Their behaviour is all based on their emotions. They are acting on their weak and immature emotions which they have no control over. And this is what makes them so dangerous. They will blame you for things that you might have done years ago. They can hold grudges and resentment for years, sometimes even a lifetime. Once you have caused a narcissistic injury, they don't know how to resolve it. They don't self reflect or look within. Their way of dealing with their intense negative emotions resulting from the narcissistic injury is to project them on to you. But this never removes them, it just provides them with a sense of relief for a short period of time. And this is how their grudges and resentment can last for such a long time, until you finally remove yourself from the environment, or they leave. These emotions are the justification, their excuse or motive for doing what they do. This is what gives them the fuel, the motivation to maintain this energy-draining, dysfunctional behaviour.



They will always either be in denial about their behaviour or have some form of excuse. But there is no excuse for abuse. Every abuser is either going to be in denial or have an excuse for why they do what they do. That does not make it ok. They might make you believe that they are harassing and stalking you because of something you have done. But in most cases, it actually has nothing to do with that. In many cases, the very people who are accusing you and targeting you because of something you have done... Have usually done something similar or far worse. Think of a narcissist and how they are always paranoid or hypervigilant that you are cheating on them. You may have researched this and found that the reason why they are so paranoid about you doing that, is because they have already cheated on you. If they haven't, they were probably thinking about it. Or they know that if there was an opportunity to do it, they would. Because of their lack of self control, they are naturally going to be paranoid that you might do the same thing. It's the same with the flying monkeys, as what they are doing is narcissistic. If the harassment and stalking really had anything to do with something you have done in your past. They would be harassing and stalking other people who have done the same thing or worse. I'm sure there are people who have done far worse things in your area. The irony is... the people who have done far worse things than you are usually the people who are pointing the finger at you. Or they are going to be the very person the flying monkeys are trying to defend. So clearly this has nothing to do with something you have done in your past. Or at least, it's not something that you have done wrong, as much as it is something that they are envious or jealous of. Think about your lifestyle or past experiences... especially around the time that you allegedly did something wrong. You should then be able to identify the real reason why they are so obsessively targeting you. Of course they are never going to admit that to you. They are pathologically envious and jealous and deep down they know this. But they are also shame-based individuals who are targeting you in an attempt of dodging their shame. They are not going to confront the shame that they feel from being pathologically envious and jealous of you. Then they would have to accepted that their abusive actions towards you really are unjustified. It has nothing to do with something you are supposed to have done in your past. Do you see them targeting anyone else? There are real murderers, child molesters and rapists out there. Do you see them targeting those people? Do you see them harassing and stalking them? Of course they are not going to do that, because they know that will only make them worse.



They also know that targeting you could potentially make whatever behaviour you allegedly have far worse too. But the difference is, they don't care. They don't care, because their abusive actions are driven by their out of control emotions. Emotions such as hate, anger, envy and jealousy. Projection of their own self hatred. These feelings override any rationality they would normally have. They override any reason or logic. Any empathy they would otherwise have for you. People don't do these things to people who have done something wrong. In a normal situation, this would be dealt with some form of reason or logic. That's why we don't go around targeting murderers, child molesters or rapists. They are dealt with using the correct and established procedure. We might feel hatred or anger towards these types of people, but that doesn't override our rational thinking. So why don't they have the same rational thinking towards you? Well the obvious difference between you and those types of people, other than the fact that they have done far worse things than you. Is that people are not normally envious or jealous of those types of people. That is the obvious difference. But flying monkeys are envious and jealous of you. And this is what overrides the rationality they would normally has. This is what overrides their reason and logic. And whatever limited empathy they would otherwise have for you. Envy and jealousy. That is the clear difference between you and those types of people. And it's the reason why they are so obsessively targeting, harassing and stalking you... rather than them. You could confront them and say that you know the real reason why they are targeting you, but it's not going to make a difference. They are not going to self reflect and suddenly have this epiphany of why they are behaving in this way. They are in denial, pretending that the reason is because you have done something wrong, because the truth is too difficult and shameful to accept. They are targeting you and only you, due to their envy and jealousy. It could be something about your character or personality. Qualities, talents or traits. Your physical appearence. Money, material things, career, relationships, social circle or connections. You may not believe it at first, especially if you are a modest or humble person. The flying monkeys have likely devalued and degraded you. Targeted your self worth and self esteem. Made you believe that you are worthless and insignificant. Well why would they go out of their way to make you believe that. If this was something they really believed to be true, they wouldn't even need to convince you. The truth is, that's exactly how they feel about themselves. They have low self worth and low self esteem. They feel worthless and insignificant. They are just projecting their emotions on to you. They are also doing this because they don't want you to come to the conclusion that they are envious and jealous of you.



By targeting your self worth and self esteem, they can then make you believe whatever they want. And you will continue to put the focus on yourself, assuming that what they are saying is true. It takes the focus off them and gives them the power to control you and the environment. They will target you for years, sometimes even an entire lifetime. They do not self reflect or look within. So they cannot resolve these painful emotions. Instead, they choose to project them on to you. But these emotions have to be reflected on, for them to be resolved. Which is how the flying monkeys are able to hold grudges and resentment for such a long period of time. Normal, functional, healthy people do not hold grudges and resentment. They want to resolve conflict because it makes them uncomfortable. But flying monkeys are different. As I said earlier, flying monkeys harass and stalk you, therefore they must have a mental disorder. Many of them are narcissistic. Narcissists enjoy drama, they enjoy dysfunctional, chaotic environments. It's what they have experienced since childhood, it's familiar to them. So they will go out of their way to recreate the same environment and even push and provoke people, until they get their desired result.

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2 Comments


Amy Kay
Amy Kay
Apr 19, 2022

Absolutely love this article and find it highly valuable in dealing with this personality type. Thank You for the incredible insight and explanation of the underlying fundamentals of this particularly deleterious behavior.

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samharper44
Feb 22, 2022

Excellent explanation in regards to another piece of the Narc 💩 pie.

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