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Writer's pictureNarc Survivor

The Narcissist Hasn't REALLY Moved On


It may look like they've moved on. It may look like they have a new partner and they're happy. It may look like they're having a great time without you. While you're left feeling defeated. While you're left feeling like you're missing out. But it's an illusion. It's a deceptive appearence and impression of happiness and joy. It's just as fake as when they were with you. Everything you thought you had with them was fake. But you think that they've moved on. And they have this great relationship with someone else. And it hurts.


You don't want to accept it. But you don't have to accept it, because it's fake. It's just as fake as yours was. And every relationship they have will be fake. There's no such thing as a real relationship with a narcissist. They're transactions. Because they don't connect or attach to you properly. They're just there for what they can get from you. Their relationships are never real. Because they never cared about you. And that is the most important part of a relationship.





To care about the other people. But you got caught up with someone who only cared about themselves. Someone who was only interested in what they could get from you. Which was not a relationship. You were just there to make them feel good. But they may have fed you the illusion of a relationship. They may have fed you lies about always being there for you. They may have said that you would do all of these things in the future. But it was all fake. None of it was real.


They were just saying that to get your money or to have sex. It was a means to an end. They reflected back to you whatever you liked or were interested in. They reflected back your desires. So that they could get what they needed from you. It was fake. It was fraudulent. And their new relationship is exactly the same. It's still fake. It's still an illusion. They don't really love or care about the new person they're with. They just love what that person can do for them.


They love how they make them feel. The new person is not getting anything from the narcissist. They're not getting the narcissist's love. Because the narcissist has no love to give. The narcissist is the only one who is consuming. By putting on an act. By reflecting back to this new person whatever they want to see. By doing that, they are constantly consuming. But they're not giving them anything. So there's no reason to feel like you're missing out on anything.


There's no reason to feel like you miss the narcissist. Because they are capable of horrific things. And when you confronted them on it, they flipped and turned against you. Because that's who they really are. They're broken and damaged. They can't deal with their own issues. They can't deal with their own self-hatred. So they push you away. Because they're not ready to love. And they will never be ready. Because they only want what they can get from you.





So don't feel jealous about them moving on. It isn't real. It's just an illusion. And the illusion is intended to make you believe that they are giving someone else their love. So that you will feel like you're missing out. But narcissists have no love to give. They just know how to create an orchestration. They know how to plan and coordinate the elements of a situation to produce their desired effect. In the grand scheme of things, the narcissist is so small and insignificiant. But for a while you were trapped looking at them having fun.


Because they were having a great time. They were doing everything that they wanted to do. And you felt like you were the one who was missing out. But it's because they made your world so small. It's not because they're so great. They reduced the size of your world when you were involved with them. Because their people became your only source of influence. You had no contact with the outside world. Which is why you need to separate yourself from them.


You have to stop looking at their social media. You have to stop responding to their messages and answering their phone calls. You have to cut them off completely. Because you're not responsible for them. You don't owe them anything. Because the only mistake you made was giving yourself to someone who didn't deserve you. And when you go no contact, you will realise just how small and insignificant they are. Because it's all an illusion.





They may try to move on and make new friends or have new relationships. And you should let them. Because soon you will realise that they're just fooling them too. And then you will find somewhere where you belong. You will find people who resonate with you. Because there is a huge world outside of the narcissist. There are 8 billion people and hundreds of countries. There are so many things for you to accomplish. There are so many things for you to do. But they created this illusion.


They made you believe that it doesn't exist. But it does exist. There is so much more to this world than just the narcissist. There are so many people for you to meet. And you will meet so many amazing people. People who are of a higher caliber than the narcissist. People who will love and respect you. Just as we all love and respect each other in this community. Because it's a big world. But the narcissist is small. They're insignificant in the grand scheme of things. So don't fall for the illusion. You made a mistake. Forgive yourself and forget about them.



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