When the narcissist is in the proximity of a person who has a positive attitude and is full of energy and new ideas. A person who is strong and powerful, a person who has the ability or capacity to do something or act in an honest genuine yet confident and driven way. A person who has the ability or capacity to direct or influence the behavior of others or the course of events. When the narcissist is in the proximity of a person like this there is one main thing that they must do.
They are attracted to you because of these qualities, abilities and talents. They admire that about you, they approve of it, they want to be around a person like that. They like your qualities, abilities and talents. It is impressive and attractive. That's what draws them to you, that is the reason why they chose you. But they didn't choose you to appreciate your qualities, abilities and talents or to respect them. It was all about what you are going to do for them, what are they going to get from you or how you are going to make them look good. They believe and hope that maybe your qualities might rub off on them or maybe they can mimic your abilities and talents or steal your ideas.
It has nothing to do with appreciation or respect, regarding what you're about or what you have to offer. It's all about you giving or surrendering everything that you have worked so hard to build over to them, everything that you have worked so hard to establish. Your inner power and strength. They want and expect you to hand it over to them. This has a strong influence and effect on them, it is very beneficial for them, a potent source of supply.
They begin by preparing and training you for this particular purpose. They get you to hand this over to them through deception, lies and manipulation. They trick you into believing that you are beneath them and that you are deserving of ill treatment or abuse. The abuse strips away your inner power and strength. They do this to capture you and keep you confined, trapped in a situation that you had no desire to be a part of. Until you become like a slave or a pet to the narcissist you are made to feel as though you are their property and you are forced to obey them. You are under their control, you are forced to work excessively hard to meet their demands, forced to comply with their commands. Whatever they direct or instruct, as though they have some type of authority over you and now have the ability to use or control you. You become excessively dependent or controlled by them.
When the narcissist is in the proximity of a powerful, strong and dynamic person, this is what they have to do. They have to immediately become resistant or oppositional to everything that you're about. They refuse to accept or comply with anything that you're about. They act as though they don't see it or it doesn't mean anything to them. They have no interest in it or it has no effect on them. This is designed to prevent any success or development and it is very harmful and unfavorable to you.
The narcissist is not being real or genuine, when they act resistant or oppositional. They have a deep level of admiration and approval for everything that you're about. That's why they chose you, that's what made you stand out, that's what attracted them to you. But they cannot acknowledge it or give it any consideration, they have to be resistant or oppositional. They have to make you appear as less important or less valuable than you actually are, they will refuse to accept or comply with your abilities, qualities and talents, to prevent any success or development. Or they will compare you to other people or other situations to make you feel invalidated or not worthy.
It is very important for them to become resistant or oppositional to everything that makes you a strong and powerful person. It is important for them to do this to break you down, to demolish everything that you have established, everything that you have built, everything that you're about. They become opposite to whatever you are naturally confident in, they become fiercely inclined to disagree or to do the opposite of what is expected or desired. They have to do this to create doubt and uncertainty within you. This is done so that maybe they can then hold the ability to control you. It makes you feel insecure, it makes you feel uncertain or anxious about yourself. These experiences with a narcissist could cause emotional distress for you in the future as a result of arousing feelings or memories associated with these particular experiences.
It's like they instinctively know to affect you and provoke emotional distress within you. No one is completely secure or completely emotionally healthy, we all have certain insecurities or emotional triggers. But the narcissist targets the the things that you are confident in, things that you naturally feel strongly about. The things that you feel confident and strongly about is where they have to strike first, because that is going to be the greatest opposition to them having the ability to control you.
A confident person knows who they are, knows what they're doing, knows what they're about and what they find comfort in. But that is a very difficult target for the narcissist to break down, so they have to create false beliefs and opinions. They have to treat you with a lack of appreciation or respect, especially the things that are the most easily perceived or understood, self-evident or apparent. They have to create false, beliefs and opinions about those things and make you feel doubtful and uncertain about it. They have to become oppositional to anything that you are naturally confident in, even if it's something as simple as your favorite TV show, or favorite color. They always have to like something that is opposite to you.
Deep down they may not even care about it, it's just about being oppositional to you. It's about going against whatever you're about or whatever you like. They can never agree with you on anything, because they're trying to create doubt and uncertainty within you. But whatever you have no desire or interest in, that is what they will acknowledge and treat in a way that is apparently kind or helpful. Over time this creates a person who is not operating normally or properly and is unable to deal with normal social relations. A person who lacks confidence in the very things that they worked so hard to build and establish to be who they are today.
If they don't like all of these things about you, why did they choose you, why did they have such a desire to be around you, why did they have such an interest in what you are about. They are trying to brainwash you, they are trying to pressurize you into adopting radically different beliefs by using systematic and often forceful means. They are trying to control, influence, make full use of and derive benefit from you in a secret or dishonest way, that would be considered unfair or underhand. This is so that they contain you, making you less powerful and easier to control, so that they can keep you as a source of supply.
They want to keep you locked in a situation or environment, where you are still able to supply them with your qualities, abilities and talents and the attention, admiration and respect that they require. While making you doubtful and uncertain of your ability to make considered decisions and come to sensible conclusions. They don't like it when you display your ability to acquire and apply knowledge and skills. They don't like it when they have to witness how positive in attitude you are and how you are always full of energy and new ideas. When you're displaying this to them, it has a strong emotional effect on them. Because they lack the power to perform, they lack the strength and the positive energy.
The more powerful you are, the more knowledge and skills energy and new ideas you have, it intimidates them and impresses them so much that they are unable to act in an in a relaxed and natural way. They are unable to act in a relaxed and natural way, because their mental process and mental function is designed in a way to protect them. If they were to acknowledge the truth and the reality of how overwhelmingly impressed they are by what you are displaying to them, they would feel inadequate or insignificant in comparison. It would cause them a great deal of psychological harm or emotional distress. So they remain in a state where they are unable to express their true emotions. Due to the harmful or dangerous effects that they may otherwise have to experience when they have to acknowledge how powerful and dynamic of a person you are.
It gives them an inferiority complex, where they feel as though they are lower in status or lower in quality than you are. To protect themselves against these feelings of being inferior and what acts as a coping or defense mechanism is when their mental process or mental function disables these feelings, putting them in an unemotional, dispassionate state and under control.
They want you to give or present yourself to them, without them having to give you or express their warm approval, admiration, respect, appreciation and compliments of who you really are. If they were to do that, you would soon realize that they don't have anything to offer. They are lacking the power to perform and you would soon realise that you are giving your power away to them. That's why whenever you meet people like this, they immediately have to make you or what you're doing seem less important or less valuable than it actually is. Because they experience feelings of discontentment and resentment aroused by your qualities, abilities and talents. They desire to have what belongs to you. So they immediately experience intense envy, jealousy and hatred towards you.
They like and respect power, but they don't like the thought or the the idea of the power that you possess. They don't like the thought or the idea of the power that you possess to have an influence or an effect on them. Because that would immediately suggest and reveal that you are superior to them. They have to interrupt your natural continuity sequence or course and crush your emotional strength and spirit, destroy your power and effectiveness. Making you less powerful and easier to control and then keep you in that state where you are unable to function, accomplish or fulfill an action or task.
They cannot allow you to exist in that powerful nature and with the inherent features, character or qualities that you naturally possess. They don't want you to exist in that powerful nature of everything that you worked so hard to get to, because you would naturally be superior to them. They want to be superior to you, that is the only way that they can keep you as a source of supply. They don't want you to display power and strength, hey don't want you to have the ability to make considered decisions or come to sensible conclusions. Because you would naturally surpass them, you would naturally have authority over them. Anyone who has the power to give orders make decisions or enforce compliance with a request is a threat to them. They are likely to cause damage or danger to what the narcissist is trying to accomplish
In most cases
when the narcissus finally decides to leave, it is because they have realised that you have realised your power and superiority over them. They tried to strip you of your power and strength as something for them to use or exploit you for. When they finally decide to leave it's because you have realized that they don't have any power. You have realized that they have tricked, controlled and influenced you in a way where you felt less than who you really are. They use brainwashing, coercive persuasion and thought control to make you conform to their wishes and demands. To make you feel as though you are inadequate, to make you feel as though you cannot deal with a situation or with life.
They cannot acknowledge or express their warm approval, admiration, respect, appreciation and compliments of who you really are. Because then they would be giving you the opportunity to have power and authority over them. That wouldn't favour or benefit them in any way, because they don't have anything to offer and they are lacking the power to perform. You would have no desire to keep them around once you've realised that they don't have anything to offer and they're not about anything.
They have to interrupt your natural continuity, sequence or course and crush your emotional strength and spirit, destroy your power and effectiveness. It makes you less powerful and easier to control. Then they can keep you in that state where you are unable to function, accomplish or fulfill an action or task, until it makes you believe that you are equal to them. You are not equal to them, you are superior to them and they are fully aware of this. That's why they have to be against you, that's why they have to be opposed to everything you're about and everything you're doing. They greatly fear that you might realize your power and superiority over them.