The DARKEST SECRET Of The Narcissist

The narcissist has a very dark secret they don't want you to know. They are often quite good at hiding it, but the truth is that the core emotion of a narcissist is envy. They experience discontentment and resentment aroused by your possessions, qualities, or luck. They desire to have it or to have you all to themselves, which is why they try to control you. They see you as a possession that belongs to them.

This is why they often feel and express bitterness and annoyance because they feel it is unfair. At times, they may even seem very angry and frustrated because of their inability to change or achieve you, to mould you into who they want you to be so that you can continue to belong to them. Once you know what to look for, it's actually quite obvious that they are envious of you. It's the reason why they targeted you in the first place. They may have even tried to rob or destroy your qualities and attributes.

Another key indicator that someone is envious of you is when they try to trigger your insecurities and make you envious of them. At times, these behaviours may be unconscious. If they are aware of it, they will try to hide it because they don't want you to see them when they are vulnerable. They fear that it may expose them to the risk of attack or harm. In actuality, an unhealed victim would likely feel most attracted to the narcissist in that moment, desiring to help and save them.

But once you've healed from narcissistic abuse, that is the very thing that will turn you away. You will desire something more healthy and normal. If you've done enough research, you will know that their envy developed in their childhood. They had unmet emotional needs and envied their parent for withholding that from them, which caused them to become attention seekers. At the same time, they became self-absorbed, preoccupied with their own feelings, interests, and situations.

They lack empathy and consideration for you while being arrogant and entitled to something from you. This is all the inevitable result of their core emotion. It's why they shut themselves off, why they end up devaluing and discarding you. They want and desire something that cannot be theirs in the way they would like, which makes them bitter and resentful. This resurfaces their childhood trauma where their emotions were neglected by their parents.

Narcissists want to be admired and adored, but they do not want anyone to see that vulnerable side of them. They want you to validate their false character. The more you try to encourage and love that true part of them, the more they will begin to hate you because they believe it's not good enough. This is what they learned in childhood as a result of being neglected by their parent. You will never see that side of them; you will only see different characters. They often have a different character for everyone they deal with.

Even if you could see what is beneath the surface, you wouldn't know how to deal with it. In that moment, they can be very fragile and may even lash out at you. Only a licensed therapist should deal with a narcissist in that state of mind. They will never show you that side of them over a long period of time. You may often witness small windows of self-reflection when they've experienced a narcissistic injury or when they're disillusioned. In that moment, they may appear shocked and caught off guard or seem bitter and resentful. But those feelings will quickly subside and be replaced by feelings of anger because they see it as an attack.

Once you've resurfaced their feelings of shame, they will become very arrogant and entitled. You will witness their envy of you as this destruction alleviates their distress and sense of emotional disabilities. Narcissists reject their true self because psychologically, they are unable to accept that they are flawed. They cannot accept their weaknesses in character and that they are damaged or imperfect in some way. The false character is meant to be superior to you. They believe it has unlimited power and is entitled to whatever it wants from you.

Their psychological survival depends on securing external validation for their supply. They have to make you believe that their illusion of perfection is reality. The only problem is that this is unattainable. It's not able to be achieved, which is why they often engage in controlling behaviours and manipulation tactics. It's also why they show a lack of empathy. It's designed to distract you from focusing on their flaws and imperfections as they endlessly chase information or evidence that they are more than other people.

For them to do this, they need to have a reference point. They need to have a basis or standard for comparison. Without a comparison, they cannot assess what is more than. This is why they targeted you. They feed their ego by valuing their own personal and social worth by assessing how they compare to you. You are their reference point, and their pathological envy acted as a magnet that drew them to you. They idealized you and put you on a pedestal until their envy led them to devalue and discard you as they eventually began to believe that they were a better you than you.

Narcissists target those who possess what is absent in them. They targeted you because of your empathy and compassion, your strength, courage, and kindness. Even though they were drawn to these qualities, it was never to value this about you. It was only so that you could mirror to them what they needed to believe about themselves. This is how they began to merge with you and mirror everything that was great about you, then try to convince not only you but themselves that the two of you are very alike. In reality, they are nothing like you; they are the exact opposite of you.

This is why they end up devaluing and discarding you. At some point, they realise that they cannot compete with you. They realise that they cannot manifest all of their lies and future faking into reality. When that realization takes place, they begin to experience a lot of pain and distress as they realise that they lack your qualities, achievements, or possessions. Up until that point, they managed to delude themselves that they are the same as you, that they are on your level, or that they can do what you do. But inevitably, this delusion comes crashing down like a house of cards as your qualities break through their denial. They realise that they are, in fact, inferior to you, which causes them to oppose you and compete with you because they feel less than you.

You set a standard that is very threatening to them. It's something that they cannot match, which puts their false character in danger. Although they may have talked the talk, they cannot walk the walk. They realise that you possess qualities and traits that they do not have. Instead, they devalue you, invalidate and abuse you, and gain pleasure from your pain because your misfortune makes them feel better. This is when they will come after you with manipulation, projection, dominance, intimidation, isolation, lying, gaslighting, smear campaigns, and ghosting.

It's not because you were randomly chosen; it's because they are envious of you. You are an amazing person. You are loving, kind, and generous, and you have a warm heart. You just forgot about it because you were around a narcissist who made you doubt yourself and made you believe that you are less than who you really are. They are envious of your skills and talents, your ability to be happy, your optimism, and your empathy. They are envious of your ability to experience real love. They wanted to destroy that which they were not able to have and that which they were not able to participate in. This is why they devalued you. They didn't want to see you moving on and experiencing something that they can't. Just the thought of it made them envy and resent you. It made them want to bring you down to their level while all you wanted to do was help them.

Their envy of you made them want to hijack all the attention while preventing you from realizing that they are beyond help. They will never be satisfied, they will never appreciate you, and they will never accept you. You become a reflection to them of everything they are not, everything they wish they could be, and a constant reminder to them that they will never be a part of it because you are not the same. This is why they try to become more like you. They take on your interests and ideals only so they can use them to triangulate you with someone else. They already know that they don't belong with you. They can't even be around you once you see them for what they are. This is why they always pull out the false character. They know you don't want to see who they actually are. They haven't even begun to work on themselves. They have depended on their manipulation tactics their entire lives. All they managed to secure by doing that were people who are foolish or people who didn't have any other options because that is all they can get. They haven't got anything to give to you. All they have achieved in their lives is from manipulating and deceiving other people, just as they did with you, from lying and future faking and selling you a dream. But they can't get you once you're aware of it because it is all a game. It's a fantasy, a delusion, and it is based on their envy of you, which is their darkest secret. They try to cover it up by deluding themselves into thinking that you are envious of them when you were the one who endlessly overextended your empathy and compassion to them while they devalued, invalidated, and abused you. Sometimes their envy is unconscious. They may not be aware that they are envious of you, but if you look at their behaviours and how they treated you, that should give you the closure and validation that you need. It should reveal to you why they inevitably turned against you because they knew that they could never be like you. They knew that you were not the same and that they could never reciprocate what you had given to them. Their only option was to fall back and fall off. They had to remain hidden. But you can share your qualities with someone who will appreciate you, someone who is more like-minded, someone who is about the same things. When you do that, you will realise why it never worked out with the narcissist.

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