Narcissists have been known to do some very sick things. They can abuse their victims for many years. They project their own insecurities onto their victims. They cheat on you. They lie to you. They steal from you. They deny any wrongdoing. They blame their victims for their own faults or mistakes. They gaslight their victims and cause them to doubt their own memory, perception, and sanity. Most victims of narcissistic abuse end up with physical brain damage. Some victims end up committing suicide, going insane or in prison. Some victims are even murdered or raped by the narcissist.
How can the narcissist do this to people? How can they not feel any guilt, shame, or remorse? Narcissists are self-absorbed. They only care about their own needs. What they need from you more than anything, is their narcissistic supply, which is essential for their emotional survival. They need to feel as though their false self exists. They need to feel powerful and significant. And this causes them to do some horrible things to you, which then results in them feeling this way. They begin to feel more emotionally stable or secure. They use you as a tool to regulate their emotions. To regulate their self-worth, self-esteem, and self-importance. When they are reflecting on their true feelings of not being worth anything, of being insignificant, that is when they are most dangerous. And they will do whatever it takes to regulate those feelings of insecurity. So that they can then feel powerful and significant again, even if it isn't real. During this moment, they can be very dangerous and they will do whatever they think will hurt you the most. Which in some cases can even involve killing their victim. You might look at the narcissist and wonder how they can do what they do. It can be difficult to put yourself in their shoes. Narcissists are very weak people, so they act differently than we do.
Their behaviour could be likened to a hurt cat who then claws at you in a desperate attempt to protect itself. When the narcissist attacks you, that is exactly what they are trying to do. They are trying to protect their weak and fragile egos. You should avoid trying to put yourself in the narcissist's shoes. Usually, it is good to empathize with people. But with the narcissist, you are going to find it very difficult to understand or justify the reasons why they do what they do. You have to understand that narcissists are very low class. They are of a low or inferior standard or quality. We expect a high standard of quality from them because that is what they displayed to us in the beginning. They try to present themselves as high-value people. They act as though that is what they are. But it's not real, it's just designed to manipulate you and trick you into giving them what they want. You should not expect a high standard or quality from the narcissist. They are low-value people. They have no boundaries and they do not respect your boundaries, so they will manipulate, use, and violate you. You will also feel as though you are enmeshed with them. You will feel as though there is no separation between your thoughts and feelings and theirs.
This is due to the lack of healthy boundaries which then results in you feeling uncomfortable. It destroys your self-esteem. This is very common among low-value people such as narcissists. They cannot respect you because they do not respect themselves. They don't care about what you want or how you feel. They don't care about your beliefs or values. All they care about is what they want, their feelings. And whatever they believe in or value. And that is why you will notice over time that their thoughts and feelings become your thoughts and feelings. You begin to think and feel in the way that they do, you find yourself becoming more and more like your abuser. You begin to place more importance on what they believe in or value. Their beliefs or values suddenly become the only thing that matters and everything that you care about or are interested in is pushed aside. How can the narcissist do what they do? Narcissists are low-value people. They are of a low standard or quality. They are self-absorbed and lack empathy. They only care about their own needs and they will exploit you to get their needs met. They have no respect for themselves, so they have no respect for you. They will do whatever they have to do to regulate their emotions. To make them feel good, even if it's only for a moment. Regardless of how it affects you or anyone else.