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Writer's pictureNarc Survivor

5 Ways To Break A Narcissist's Heart


Breaking a narcissist's heart is very different to breaking a normal person's heart. Narcissists are affected by different things. To break their heart, you must understand how their mind works. They don't really care about love or intimacy. They're more concerned with power and control. And any threat to their power and control will break their heart. 1. Validate yourself



The narcissist wants to invalidate you. They want to put you down. They want you to be feel bad about yourself. So they will insult you. They will give you backhanded compliments. They will invalidate you. Until you begin to invalidate yourself. Until you begin to believe that you are unloveable. They will target your self-esteem. Because it gives them the ability to control you. It prepares you to obey them unquestioningly. Because you feel less important. As though you're their subordinate. Which is why you must accept yourself. You must have confidence in your qualities and abilities. You must recognise your suffering and misfortune. Instead of always putting the narcissist's needs first. Trust your intuition. And then you will no longer be under their spell. You will be able to stop them from manipulating you. If you don't value yourself, other people will determine your value for you. 2. Slow it down Narcissists want things to move fast. They will do anything to be with you. They will want to move in with you. They will start talking about marriage and having children. And you may only have known them for a few weeks. But they may act charming. And you may feel flattered that they want to be with you. Because they will lavish you with praise and compliments. But you need to slow it down. You need to recognise that they are doing it insincerely and with the aim of furthering their own interests. 3. Don't react Narcissists are always looking for a reaction. They're always looking for information or statements of opinion. And they don't mind if it's negative. Because if they can make you feel angry or upset, it makes them feel like they have power over you. As long as you react, they feel like they have won. Which is why you should always be in control of your emotions. Because as long as they see that their actions are having an effect on you, they will continue to abuse you. You must show no emotion. You must be unresponsive. 4. Set strong boundaries If you don't set limits, the narcissist will easily manipulate you into giving in to their every demand. They need someone who will do whatever they want. Someone who isn't going to say "no". Someone who is easy. Someone who is desperate for validation and approval. Don't be that person. Set strong boundaries. Don't let them use you.



5. Don't accept blame The narcissist will try to hold you responsible for their problems. They will blame you for everything. But you need to recognise your innocence. Because you didn't know their intentions. You didn't know what they were trying to do. They kept you in the dark. You were uninformed. They deceived you so that they could gain power. So don't doubt yourself. Remind yourself of your innocence.


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