The narcissist will ruin the positive beliefs and opinions that other people have of you. Because they don't care about your reputation. They don't care about how they make you look to other people. But the narcissist's reputation is very important to them. Image is everything to a narcissist. So they don't like it when you say bad things about them. Even if what you're saying is true. The narcissist will say lies about you to ruin your reputation. But to ruin theirs, all you have to do is tell the truth. The narcissist will use lies and rumours to manipulate people. To get them to believe their side of the story. Because they don't care about your reputation. And once they've used all of these lies and rumours and you take them back. You will look like a fool, after everything they've done to you. And even if you try to ruin their reputation by telling the truth about them. The narcissist isn't really going to care. And they won't have a problem being around the people you told the truth to. Because they know they've got you where they want you.
They already know they've won. And they know those other people don't have more power over you than they do. They know they have control over you. Those other people may have told you not to put up with it. They may have told you to leave the narcissist. But the narcissist knows you're only going to listen to them. Because you've been under their spell for a very long time.
So they see it as though they're more powerful than you are. They believe that everyone will listen to them. Which is why they don't care about how they make you look. Because you're not the dominant force in that situation. They're the ones who have the power over other people. Which means that they can do whatever they want to you. And if you still choose to go back to them, after they haven't done anything to correct those lies and rumours... It makes it look like everything they said about you was true. It makes the narcissist look better. It makes them look like they're ready and willing to forgive you. It makes them look like a good person. Which is why if they start a smear campaign against you, you have to ignore it. And you cannot return to the narcissist. Because otherwise you will be validating the smear campaign. Once you've told other people about how the narcissist has been treating you. You will look foolish for taking the narcissist around to those other people. For being seen with the narcissist. It will make you look foolish. And it will just make them feel untouchable. It will make them feel like they run everything. As though there's nothing anyone can do to stop them. Despite everything they've done to you. Because they don't care about your reputation. They don't care about how they make you look. They care about how they look. They care about their reputation. They care about how they present themselves to the world. But they don't care about how you look.
They just see it as though you made yourself look that way, by taking them back. They don't see it as though they're forcing you. They see it as though you're making your own decisions. And they see it as though you're making yourself look foolish by taking them back. They don't care about your reputation, because they see it as though you're doing it to yourself. They don't feel bad for you, because you keep taking them back. If you accept it, there's no reason for them to feel bad.
Which is why they don't care about how they make you look. Because your reputation is not important to them. Unless it affects them. Unless it makes them look bad. Which is why you need to realise that your reputation is more important to you than it is to the narcissist.
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