The narcissist will trick and deceive you into doing something contrary to your interests and intentions. They will lure you in and try to catch you in their trap. The narcissist will trap you with children. They will trap you with marriage. But they will do it under the guise of wanting to start a family. Or for religious reasons. To catch you off guard. Because they have a hidden reason for doing it. They use marriage and children to make you think that they're always going to be there for you. To make you think they're always going to be there to support you. And they're not going to leave. They're not going to go anywhere. Because they want a serious relationship. They don't want to mess around. But they're just manipulating you.
They're looking for a situation that works for them and provides them with what they need. But they're not concerned about your well-being or about how it affects you. They're just looking at how you're living. They're looking at your attitudes, tastes, moral standards and economic level. They're looking at what you've got. And they're wanting to take it. But they're also looking at who's around you. They're studying your support network. And they're trying to find the most efficient way to secure you. So that they can get what they want. They're using marriage and children to manipulate you. Because they're only seeking their own advantage, pleasure and well-being.
They have no thought for your wishes or needs. They're very selfish. And that is why they won't just settle for a relationship They will try to marry you and have children with you. And they will even use religion to trap you. Because then they will have the support of the community. They will have the support of a group of people who live in the same place. And have certain attitudes and interests in common. And who see your commitment and dedication to each other as an accomplishment. So now they look like they're acting in accordance with rules and standards. They look like they're conformable. But they're just using it to control you. They're using it to gain an advantage over you. Because now everything looks genuine and sincere.
No one suspects that they're doing anything wrong. But they've made you unavailable. To where you only belong to them. And if you value marriage and you have children with them, you're not going to give up so easily. You're going to fight for it. You're going to do whatever they want you to do. Which they will use to contain you. They will use it to imprison you. Because now you can't just change your decision or opinion about it. You're married. You had a wedding. And everyone knows about it. You had children. And it was an excited emotional display. It was broadcasted to the community. That this is the person you're meant to spend your life with. This is the person you choose. So now you have to maintain this false image of being the narcissist's husband or wife.
Which is very difficult and unpleasant to do. Because after some time, you start to see who they really are. They give their false character to the community. While they're abusing you. While they're intimidating and controlling you. So no one is going to believe you. Everyone thinks you have a good marriage. Everyone thinks you have a good husband or a good wife. Because they don't know what's going on behind the scenes. They're looking at it from the outside. They don't see that the narcissist is out of control. They don't see that they're mistreating you. So you're stuck in a marriage. You're stuck with children. And you realise that you've been tricked. They deceived you. But the narcissist has already gone around and manipulated your family and friends. So they're only going to try to strengthen and support your marriage.
They're not going to listen to you. They're not going to believe you. They're not going to encourage or support you if you decide to leave. They're not going to be there for you. They're going to tell you to remain strong and constant in effort. In something that's only going to break you down. Something that's only going to destroy you in the end. But they will encourage you to have faith. They will tell you to trust in God. But God has already given you the answer. Because you've devoted yourself to this person, but things haven't got better. They've got worse. But people will tell you that you need to hold on. You need to remain strong. And that is how some people end up confined to their abusers for years. Because they were trying to make things right.
They were trying to serve the narcissist. But by doing that, they ended up destroying themselves. They ended up more miserable. More depleted. Because they don't realise that the narcissist was using religion and marriage to manipulate and control them. Because the narcissist knew that people wouldn't criticise or oppose it. If they're claiming to be someone with religious faith. Instead, people will support and encourage you to stay together. They're not going to listen to you if you're talking about leaving and getting a divorce. Because they will see it as though it's against the religion. But they're not the ones who have to deal with it. Although some of them may be being abused in their own marriages. And they're still choosing to continue with it. It may seem like they're in a trance.
Like they're under a spell. Like they can't see the forest for the trees. Because they've been brainwashed. They've been pressurised into adopting radically different beliefs, by using systematic and forcible means. By people who don't even follow the religion. People who don't even believe in God. People who are just playing a role. People who are pretending to be something else, in order to deceive their victims for fraudulent gain. Religious communities are overwhelmed with fake people. People who are pretending to be something they're not. And if you can't distinguish who's real and who's fake, you're going to be in serious trouble. Because everyone in that community is going to share the same beliefs as the narcissist.
They're not going to support you if you're thinking for yourself or making your own decisions. They're going to tell you to remain strong. They're going to tell you to trust God and have faith. While you're being abused. While you're being mistreated. And you're falling deeper and deeper into a situation that is detrimental and disadvantageous for you. Because even when you decide to leave, you're not going to have a support network. You're going to have to leave your entire community. Because they're going to shame you. They're going to look down on you.
Marriage and children is the perfect environment for a narcissist to trap you. To contain you. To keep you under their control. It's the perfect environment for them to isolate you. To leave you without any support. And for them to be your only source of influence. And that is why many narcissists do desire to get married and have children. And usually they want to do it fast. Before you have time to consider what you're getting yourself into. They want to create a sense of urgency. To put you under pressure. To make you make a decision. So that you don't have time to even think about why they're wanting to marry you. You don't realise that they have an ulterior motive.