Updated: May 15
How to not let the narcissist affect your energy. How to stop giving away your power to the narcissist. When you are around the narcissist, you might feel as though they are draining your energy. You might feel sad, confused, tired or sick. You might have tension in your face, throat or other parts of your body. You might have a dry mouth, you might feel as though it is difficult to breathe. You might start developing negative thoughts and negative ways of thinking. You might develop a mindset of feeling hopelessness and as though nothing could ever be enough. You might develop chronic stress, anxiety or depression. These are the kinds of symptoms that you might experience when you are around the narcissist.
Emotions are very contagious. We often mimic each other's emotions without even realising it. Whether the emotions are positive or negative, they can be contagious. The more someone expresses their emotions, the more likely it is that you will then notice their expression and then mimic their emotions. It has been said that it is easier to catch an emotion than it is to catch a cold. The difference with catching an emotion is that we often don't realize it and we assume that the emotion belongs to us. We don't realize that the emotion is being transferred from someone else. When you catch the narcissist's negative emotions and absorb their negative energy, it can lead to sadness, fatigue, stress, anxiety and depression.
You might have been positive or in a good mood before interacting with a narcissist. When you are interacting with them, you may notice a feeling of heaviness a, feeling of great density or thickness of great intensity or force, that just seems to bring you down. It is as though you have been brought down to their level or their frequency and no matter how positive or high-energy you are, you can still be brought down.
Negative energy seems to have it greater density or thickness, a greater intensity or force. No matter what you do, it feels as though you are being sucked in, it feels as though you're being pulled down to their level or frequency. Sometimes it can be certain topics that people are talking about, that then affects your energy and lowers your mood. Other times they don't even have to say anything, you can feel it just from being around them. You could just sense their energy and that is enough to bring you down. That is enough to make you feel stressed, anxious or depressed.
You cannot have power over the narcissist's energy, you cannot control the vibe that they are giving off. But one thing that you can control is your own mind. You have the ability to choose or decide what something means to you, you have the ability to decide what affects you. When you let the narcissist's energy affect you, when you absorb their energy, it is
because you are matching the condition that they are in at that specific time. You are matching their frequency, you are matching who they are and that is when you feel that you are absorbing their negative energy. You feel as though it is becoming a part of you.
To avoid absorbing the narcissist's energy, you need to remain in your own energy. You need to be the cause, rather than the effect. Remain in your frequency, remain in your good mood. The narcissist will be unable to partake and they will be unable to bring you down to their level. So then they will be forced to leave the interaction. The disagreement or argument will be unable to continue. If you are dealing with a toxic or negative person, they will have to match your frequency or energy state to continue the interaction with you.
Emotions and energy are very contagious. Our emotions and energy are very contagious to other people. It's not always about what you say or even how you say it, it's about the energy underneath the words that you are saying. If you focus on staying in a good mood, laughing and smiling and just having a good time, at first they might be resistant to your positive energy, but eventually they will catch your energy. Your emotions and your energy will transfer on to them. When you are interacting with someone, whoever has the most certainty about something has the power. Whoever has the firm conviction that something is the case, whoever is the most confident has the ability or capacity to direct or influence the behavior of others and the course of events. Their frame and their rigid structure is unable to bend or be forced out of shape. It is not flexible, it is not able to be changed or adapted, so it then has power over whoever is leading the interaction.
Remain grounded in who you are. Remain steady or balanced, rather than shaking or moving. Choose in accordance with wisdom or prudence. Be at the cause, rather than the effect. Give rise to action, be committed to a principle, aim or movement. Be prepared to defend or advocate your objectives or interests, rather than being a result or consequence of an action or cause.
You don't need to change their negativity, change the way you think about it. Don't even label it as negativity. When you label someone as being negative, you are giving them power over you. You are stating that their negative energy has the power to affect you. Which means that you are at the effect, rather than the cause. Change the way you think about it, change the way you respond to it. Choose to have control over how you feel, choose the direction of the conversation. Instead of matching their frequency, remain in your own frame and they will be forced to either match your frequency or they will leave the interaction.
You don't have to resonate with their energy or emotions. You don't have to resonate with their frequency. You don't have to resonate at the same level or way of being as they are. You have the power within you to decide what affects you. If you choose to remain in your own frame and on your own frequency and you are certain that it is the state of being that you prefer, or the state of being that you resonate with. You are no longer absorbing the narcissist's energy. The power is within you. You have the power over how you think and how you feel. Be at the cause, rather than the effect.