When You SURPASS The Narcissist's Unrealistic Expectations

It’s no secret that narcissists have unrealistic expectations. They expect the world from you. They expect you to climb mountains and reach for the stars. But what happens when you actually manage to do the impossible? What happens when you climb out of the pit they created for you? What happens when you exceed their expectations, when you become greater than they ever imagined, or when you do better than them?

When you surpass the narcissist’s unrealistic expectations, you’ll realise that all the problems, drama, and chaos they created were for no reason. There was never a real problem. They were quite comfortable with the situation as it was. But when you finally succeed, the real problem becomes apparent—it will be completely obvious that they never actually wanted to see you succeed. They never wanted to see you shine.

All that time when you didn’t succeed was because they were intentionally holding you back, even though they made you believe they cared about you. The truth is, they didn’t want to see you win. They didn’t want to see you happy or healthy. They didn’t want you to feel satisfied with yourself or your life.

This doesn’t always have to be a narcissistic partner. It could be a friend, co-worker, boss, or even your own parent. One of the main reasons they hate your success is because they fear you may abandon them. They fear you may leave, and they don’t want you to go anywhere. They may even want you to regress to a worse or less developed state because it benefits them. It enables them to maintain their influence and control over you. But they can’t do that if you’re greater than them, which is why they don’t want to see you succeed.

Remember, it’s all about them. They don’t care about what you could do with your success or how many lives you could change. Sometimes, they’re not even bothered if your success could have made a positive impact on their own lives. Why? Because it’s still your success—it belongs to you, and they don’t want you to have anything.

If you do succeed, they will throw shade and hate on you. This may not make sense to you because they could have had more money, a better quality of life, or other benefits. But narcissists always catastrophise. They imagine the worst possible outcome of you elevating in life and being around other people—people who are far more attractive, successful, or ambitious than they are. They assume you’re going to leave them.

When a person becomes successful, they typically surround themselves with others on the same level—people who are powerful and well-connected. This poses a serious threat to the narcissist in your life. They may also imagine all the attractive men or women who might be interested in you, which would make them very jealous. They see these people as competition, vying for your attention. So, they hold you back because they don’t want to see you succeed. They don’t want to see you happy or healthy because they assume you’ll leave them, which causes them immense anxiety.

Although narcissists may appear arrogant, it’s often a mask to compensate for deep insecurities. They already feel beneath you, so if you succeed and become greater, they’ll feel even smaller—especially when they see you interacting with more powerful and successful people. Nothing would make them feel more insecure.

If you do succeed, they won’t celebrate your success. They’ll downplay it, act like it’s nothing, or even try to hold you back. For example, you may graduate from university, but the narcissist won’t attend the event. They’ll always find something more important to do than celebrate your achievements. Even if they’ve been putting you down all along, your success was never the problem. They were keeping you down intentionally because they fear abandonment. They assume that the more successful you become, the more likely you are to leave them. This resurfaces their insecurities and makes them feel inadequate.

If you outdo them, it will make them envious and jealous, causing a narcissistic injury. They may rage openly or become passive-aggressive. Even if the narcissist in your life is more successful than you, your success will still make them think you’re going to leave them. It could be something as simple as getting a new job or making an improvement in your life. That’s enough to trigger their abandonment anxiety.

Narcissists are very different from normal people. They get jealous because they were comfortable with how things were. If they see you moving forward, they’ll try to hold you back. The more malignant narcissists may even sabotage your success or steal from you. But when you fail, they’ll blame you. They’ll say it’s your fault and find excuses instead of taking accountability for their actions.

This is why it’s best to hide your success from the narcissist if you can. They’ll only be negative and pessimistic. They’ll focus on the bad or depressing aspects of your success to dampen your happiness and enthusiasm. They want to kill the mood, ruin the moment, and spoil everything. They want to hinder your enjoyment.

Whenever they see you happy or excited about something, they’ll mention bad news or give you negative information. Their happiness is not like yours. They avoid introspection and would rather be numb than confront their own negative emotions. Because they don’t deal with their negative emotions, they can’t experience positive ones. This is why they’re always miserable and why they try to pull you down.

Narcissists are insecure, with low self-worth and self-esteem. They act arrogant, but they’re their own worst critics. They don’t like to change for themselves, let alone for you. Seeing you change makes them feel broken inside because they can’t change. They constantly compare themselves to you, using you as a reference point for how well they’re doing. If you start succeeding, they’ll feel less than you, so they’ll try to dim your light and make you seem less impressive.

You’re better off not sharing your accomplishments with narcissists. Share them with people who genuinely care—people who want to see you win and live your best life. Narcissists will only hate on you and ruin everything. They’ll diminish your shine, darken the mood, and destroy the moment. They can’t meet you at your level, so they’ll try to bring you down to theirs.

True happiness and success come from within. They’re based on your personal choices and goals, not someone else’s. Narcissists will always compare themselves to others, which is why they’re never truly happy. No matter how much they achieve, it’s never enough. They’re still miserable and jealous of you because their happiness is fake. But your happiness and success are real, and they’re meant for you.

If you found this information helpful, please give it a like below. Your support helps our community grow. Thank you!