Narcissists can be very clever and manipulative. They will do anything to get what they want from you. Which may leave you feeling helpless. As though there is nothing you can do to protect yourself. But there are actually many ways that you can defeat the narcissist.
1. Healing When you heal yourself, the narcissist will be unable to hurt you. They can only hurt you while you still have unhealed wounds from the past. You may notice that they poke at your wounds when you are at your lowest. They have this predatory sixth sense that allows them to sense when you are feeling down. But once you heal those wounds, they can no longer get to you. Because it will no longer affect you. And then the narcissist will struggle to exist around you.
They will struggle to survive emotionally. Because when they can constantly poke at your unhealed wounds, it's what keeps them alive. It's what gives them their fuel. Which is why one of the narcissist's greatest fears, is that one day you will reach a point where you don't care anymore. But when you make that fear a reality, you gain back control over your own life.
2. Mirror the narcissist
It may seem as though all the narcissist ever does is try to get a reaction out of you. They always have this desire to hurt you. To cause you pain and distress. The reason why they do this, is because it makes them feel alive. When you react emotionally to what they're saying or doing, it gives them fuel. It makes them feel better about themselves. However the narcissist feels in that moment, is how they want you to feel. But there is a way to defeat the narcissist in these situations. When they try to make you angry or upset, you can mirror their behaviour. Which will then deflect their emotions back where they belong.
3. Go no contact If the narcissist is difficult to deal with, sometimes the only option is to go no contact. Because they're never going to change. And when you stay in contact with them, you're just giving them more opportunities to hurt you. Because that's all they're going to do. But when you go no contact with the narcissist, they can no longer get to you. They can no longer hurt you.
4. Grey rock method
In some situations, it may be difficult to cut off all contact with the narcissist. But there is still another way that you can defeat them. And that is by using the grey rock method. To use the grey rock method, you have to be dull and uninteresting like a grey rock. Do not react to them emotionally and just respond with short answers. When you do that, you cut off their supply. But be careful when you do that. Your attention is very important to the narcissist. They will do anything to get a reaction from you. So when you use the grey rock method, in some situations it may make them very angry.
5. Agreeance The narcissist will blame you for everything. They will shame you for your faults and mistakes. They will blame you for things that they are responsible for. Which may make you feel guilty. It may make you feel like you are responsible for something, that you cannot fix or change. Because really, it isn't your responsibility. Which may leave you feeling helpless. Because you are powerless to correct the situation. But even in these situations, there is a way to take back your power. And that is by agreeing with them. They want you to defend yourself to them. Because then you're giving your power away. But they're not expecting you to agree with them. Which is why they won't know how to respond to that. The narcissist always wants to be in opposition to you. That is what strips you of your power. Because it makes you defend yourself. But when you agree with them, they hold nopower or influence over you. And then you are free to move in the direction that you choose.
6. Acceptance
Narcissists are very fragile and insecure. Which is why they will criticise you to make themselves feel better. They will shift the blame on to you. They will project their weaknesses and insecurities on to you. They will do anything to make you feel small, so that they can feel like they are better than you. So that they can feel like you are the one with the problem. But instead of defending yourself, you can do something that they refuse to do. You can self-reflect and question if what they're saying is true. Give yourself the opportunity to make adjustments or improvements. So that you can be a better person. Narcissists can be your motivators.
7. Remain calm The narcissist will do anything to get an emotional response out of you. Just so that they can say that you're crazy or emotionally unstable. Which is why it is very important for you to remain calm. When you remain calm, it makes it very difficult for them to hurt you.
8. Take your focus off the narcissist Stop giving them your attention. They will do anything to take your attention away from things that should be more important to you. Narcissists need your attention to feel like they exist. And they will do anything to get it. They may try to manipulate you. But if they know that you're not susceptible to their manipulation, they will try to hurt you. Whatever they say or do, it's almost always an act. It's just designed to get your attention. So disengage from the illusion and focus on something else.
The narcissist will do anything to cause you emotional distress. They are emotionally abusive. And this abuse may leave a mark. It may have a devastating effect on you. It may cause you anxiety and stress. But you can overcome this by having an awareness of your body. Practice meditation. Practice deep breathing. And use visualisation. When you do that, you will feel more calm and you will make healthier decisions. Despite the difficult situation that you may be experiencing.