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Writer's pictureNarc Survivor

Why The Narcissist Is Destined To Die Alone


Many narcissists are destined to die alone. They're destined to get older and then experience nothing but loneliness and sadness. Where they become very bitter and resentful towards the opposite sex. Because they feel like they have been treated unfairly. They will never look at themselves. They will never adjust their way of thinking. They will never hold themselves accountable for their actions. And that is why they're destined to die alone. Because accountability is the key to success in any area of our lives. But all the narcissist ever did was blame other people when things went wrong. They never looked at themselves and made the necessary changes. We cannot control other people. We cannot choose how other people behave. We can try to influence their actions or decisions. But in the end it's up to them how they choose to respond. We can only change ourselves. By taking responsibility for where we are in life. By realising that it is our own actions and decisions that have led us to where we are now. By tracing our steps back to that fork in the road. Where we went in the wrong direction. By understanding what made us make those actions and decisions. And then choosing a different path.



To then achieve a more favourable outcome or result. Which is something that the narcissist will never do. They will always blame a person or circumstance for their misfortune. Which is why they never change or develop. Their disorder is maladaptive. They have an inability to assimilate. They cannot take in or understand fully certain information or ideas. They cannot absorb or integrate into a wider society or culture. Because everything has to go their way. Everything has to revolve around them. There's no room for them to accomodate another person's desires or needs. Because the narcissist has a void that can never be filled. It can never be filled because they refuse to look within and attend to it. Instead they expect us to attend to them and fulfil their needs. Which is what we try to do, until we realise that we cannot change them. We can only change ourselves. And it is their inability to change that prevents them from being able to sustain a long-term relationship. Because eventually people just get fed up of having to do everything their way. Relationships are meant to be recriprocal. There's supposed to be a mutual benefit. Rather than one person being drained of their energy and resources, to feed or sustain the other person. But this is a concept that narcissists do not understand. How could they ever understand it? You cannot rationalise anything with someone who has a large, gaping wound inside of their chest. Or someone who is hanging of the edge of a cliff. Which is why there's just no way to get through to them. There's no way to get them to understand. Because any time that you don't make everything about them... In their minds, you're the problem. You're expected to be at their beck and call. It's like they're suffering from severe injuries. They cannot survive unless you are there to sustain their false self. Which is why narcissists cannot be alone. They need a source of supply. They need someone to provide them with a sense of stability and security. That's what keeps them sane. It gives them a purpose. But they never have that person's best interest in mind. They just manipulate and exploit those people. They take advantage of them. They use them. And when they have nothing left to give, they toss them aside. Like they're garbage. But they never regret their actions. In their minds it's always the other person's fault. And that is why they're destined to die alone. Because they never learn from their mistakes. Which is why you should not feel bad for them. This video is not a pity party for the narcissist. They had plenty of options to choose from. But they abused them all. They mistreated them. They refused to limit themselves to one person. Even if they found someone who was perfect for them. They were always looking for something else. They wanted to see what else was out there. It's a never-ending cycle. First, they idealise their target. Then they devalue them. And then finally they discard them. But then it just starts all over again with someone else. They refuse to limit themselves to one person. Because they always want more. They always want something better. They want someone who is more attractive. Or someone with more money. But even when they get that, it's still not enough. They just keep wanting more and more. But they're never satisifed. Which is why they're destined to die alone. Because although they may have met lots of good people. They always felt like they could do better. They always wanted more. They always thought the grass was greener on the other side. They always felt that what they had wasn't good enough. In the end, the narcissists who were once so loud and grandiose, eventually become covert. They play the victim. They act like everyone did them wrong. And they become very bitter and resentful. As though life has just been unfair to them. Rather than accepting that they brought this on themselves. It's the result of their own actions. They chose this. And they could have made a different choice, but they didn't.



Eventually many narcissists will even choose to be alone. Because they have a long list of what they're looking for in a relationship partner. But a very short list or no list at all of what they have to bring to the table. Many of these narcissists act arrogant and grandiose. But they don't actually have any qualities, skills or resources that would benefit you or improve your life in any way. It's all in their heads. Which is why when you get involved with them, you find that they're just a hindrance in your life. They're just setting you back. Because they lied about their abilities. They had to make you believe that they were on your level. Because they didn't want to settle for anything less. But eventually, the truth reveals itself. When you're longer able to perform at the same standard as you did before. Because they lied to you. They exaggerated everything. They sold you a dream. And eventually, you just wake up. You see the truth. And if you don't get rid of them, they'll get rid of you. Because they don't want truth. They don't want to deal with reality. They want the fantasy. It just gets to the point where people begin to wake up. No one wants to participate in this fantasy any more. Which is why they eventually end up alone. Not because they can't find anyone. But because they don't want to be with someone who is beneath what they think they deserve. Because that would just reflect back to them that maybe they're not special or important. It would reflect back to them that they're not much better than the average person. Which is what their narcissism is designed to deny. So instead they become bitter and resentful at the world. They act like they've been treated unfairly. As though they're deserving of something better or greater. When the truth is much worse than what they're trying to deny. Because while they may think that they deserve more than what they've received. The truth is that those relationships failed because they were not deserving of them. But in the end, they act like those people were not deserving. They cut off or resent anyone who is not willing to validate this illusion. The narcissist is destined to die alone. Because they will always choose their false self over their source of supply. The illusion is more important to them than love or any form of connection. Because they live in fear, that maybe they're not special or important. In life, we have two choices. We can choose to live in fear. Or we can choose to live with love. But for narcissists it's not a choice. Because they've lived in fear for so long. They don't know anything else. So eventually they just die alone because they're afraid. They target people who they think are better than them. Because then it makes them feel like they are better. Then they can feel better about themselves. Rather than accepting themselves as they actually are. Because all they're really doing is running from themselves. That's the purpose of the idealisation, the devaluation and the discard. That's the purpose of the illusion. It's a distraction. They create these different characters. Which they abandon eventually. And they abandon everyone and everything that goes along with these characters. Until there's nothing left. Because if you've spent years of your life working on yourself, to become the person that you are today.



You're probably not going to want to live in a fantasy. You're going to be content with your reality. You're not going to want to conform to an illusion. But the narcissist never worked on themselves. They just decided one day that they're something, without putting any work in. Which is why they're only option is to sustain the illusion. Without that, there's nothing. All they can do is pull people into their world. Until those people realise that it's not real. And then the narcissist will either remove them from their fake world, or those people will leave on their own. Once you discover that it's all a lie, there's really nothing you can do. You can't rationalise with the narcissist. You cannot bring truth to the situation. Because truth is death to a narcissist. So in the end, a lot of them have to be alone. Because that's the only way that they can survive. That's the only way that they can sustain the illusion. Because although they may have tried to brainwash you. They're also victims of their own manipulation. They're under the same spell. And they want to stay there. Because reality was too painful for them to deal with.

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kathyh60huffman
Mar 14, 2022

You nailed it once again NS. I left my narc bitter & alone. Yes. He's 62 yrs old & mean as a snake! We met when we were in our 20's. Ive been gone for 2 yrs. He is so hateful. And alone. Good luck survivors. Get outta there...

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