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When You Catch The Narcissist Out

Writer's picture: Narc SurvivorNarc Survivor

When you reveal that they are lying about something. That they have spoken falsely or uttered truth knowingly. When you reveal that they have said something that is not true in order to deceive you. Narcissists are pathological liars. They're constantly in survival mode. And they believe that they have to lie to survive. They are very insecure. So they need supply. And they get supply by lying to you and manipulating you. It makes them feel like they're in control. Which is what they want. Because when they were children, they felt like they were not in control. Something traumatised them. They had a disturbing experience that shocked and upset them. And it caused lasting emotional pain. So from that moment, they decided that they need to manipulate people in order for them to survive. They don't believe that it's safe for them to be themselves. They don't believe that they can get what they want just by asking for it. Just by being normal and rational. In their minds, they have to hold on to whatever they can. They have to manipulate you into giving it to them. And that is why they will lie.



They will lie about all kinds of things. Even things that are going to be obvious in the future. When they know that at some point you're going to catch them out. Which is why it's actually very easy to catch them out. They will promise to deal with something. They will promise to be responsible. They will promise to be loyal to you. But then they don't end up doing it. Maybe they try to make up excuses. And they end up lying even more. If you catch them out, they may say that it's not their fault. They may even blame you or someone else. They will tell you not to worry about it. They will say that they will take care of it. But then they don't end up doing it. And then they will gaslight you. They will make you question your own reality. They will make you question your own memory, perception and sanity. Until you begin to think you're losing your mind. Because even if you confront them on it, they will deny it and deflect it on to you. They will tell you they had nothing to do with it. They will blame you or someone else. Or they will make up some excuse. There will always be a reason why they couldn't do it. Or for why they did what they did. It's never their responsibility. It's always someone else's problem. And most often, they will blame you. You will be the cause of it. It will be because of your mistakes. They will devalue and degrade you. They will label you as the problem. As though you did something wrong. And finally, they will treat it as unworthy of serious consideration. As though it didn't really matter. They will tell you to stop talking about it. They will order you to leave. Or they will expect you to allow them to leave. They will ghost you. They will end their relationship with you suddenly and without explanation. They will withdraw from all communication, in the hopes that you will forget about it. Because they don't care if it hurt you. They don't care enough to recognise the importance of your feelings. So they're not even going to apologise. They're just going to sweep it under the rug and move on. When you catch the narcissist out, they're not going to own up to it. They're not going to accept responsiblity. They're not going to apologise. And they're not going to show you any compassion for what they put you through.



They're going to make up excuses. They're going to gaslight you. They're going to blame you or someone else. And then they're going to expect you to forget about it. It's not going to have anything to do with them. There's different classes of people in this world. And they lack class and status. They lack excellence. Because they lack character. They lack integrity and virtue. They don't have any feelings or views of their own traits, beliefs and purpose within the world. They lack values and principles.


So they don't even know what type of person they really are. Which is why they don't stand for anything. They're not willing to fight for the type of person they are. Because there's just nothing there. They're nothing. Which is why they don't take responsibility for their actions. Because the only thing they're concerned with is their own survival. And responsibility is like death to them. So they're never going to take responsibility for their lies. They will just find a way so that the blame and guilt isn't attributed to them.


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carlyworks555
carlyworks555
Jan 28, 2023

I think that's really interesting. They are always in survival mode. That means that they will never know peace. I bet they can't stand to be alone. There would be no supply. I never would have purposely gone into isolation by choice but, now I'm starting to notice that I'm changing. I care less about what people think or feel about me. I have spent so much time by myself that I only have to please myself and I only have to live up to my own expectations. If I let myself down, I forgive myself and then I move on. I did find another narcissist. I must be attracted to them. They seem so innocent. That's so funny because,…

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