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Writer's pictureNarc Survivor

When The Narcissist Realises They Can't Mess With You

When you leave the narcissist. When you stop responding to their texts and phone calls. When you get over them. That is when they will become obsessed with you. Because they need to know what went wrong. They need to know why they're not good enough for you. They can't just accept that they can't mess with you. They need to get you back. They can't just let you leave. They can't let you be the one to walk away. So they will hoover you. They will try to get you back. Just so they can break up with you. Because they can't be the one who can't mess with you. They can't accept that. They want to be one that you desire. The one that you're longing and yearning for. The one that you can't live without. So if you break up with them, they will become obsessed with you. They will text and call you. They will come to your home. They will contact your family and friends. And they will play the victim.



They will act like they don't know what they've done wrong. They will try to get you back. But you cannot let them mess with you again. You need to take away your hopes and dreams for the future. Because you've already given everything you had. And you got back nothing in return. You couldn't even be yourself around the narcissist. You lost yourself to fit into their mould of what they wanted you to be. Until you finally decided to not let them mess with you anymore. But they're not going to be heartbroken. They're not going to miss you as a person. Because they don't even remember anything good about you. They only focus on the bad things. Things that they've exaggerated in their minds. Things that they've made up. And they've already taken everything that they thought was good about you. They've taken all of your energy and money. They've drained it out of you. They've stolen your personality traits. So they don't think they need you anymore. Because they believe they're a better version of you. When the narcissist realises they can't mess with you. They will take it as rejection. They will be offended. And they will become very angry. Because they see you as an object that exists to serve them. You exist to make their lives easier and better. So they expect you to do whatever they want. Even though they don't do anything for you. But when they realise they can't mess with you, they will throw a temper tantrum. Or they will give you the silent treatment. They will become bitter and resentful. They will hold a grudge against you. And they will see it as though you're punishing them. As though you're withholding something from them. Something that belongs to them. Because they see you as an object. They see you as their property. They feel entitled to your time, regardless of how they treat you. But you won't let the narcissist mess with you, because you know you can do better. You know you deserve better. Which will cause a narcissistic injury. It will make them very angry. Because they will see it as though you think you're better than them. Which is an insult to the narcissist. They see it as an attack on their character. So they're going to threaten and intimidate you. They're going to provoke fear, guilt and shame. They're going to do anything they can to make you engage with them again. And if that doesn't work, they will find other ways to get to you. Through your job, family or friends. They will try to find some other way to bring you down. Because they're very arrogant and entitled.



If they want something, they believe they should have it. They expect you to hand it over to them. And if they can't have it, they will try to destroy it. So that no one has it. Because they're very envious and jealous. And they don't want you to be good for anyone after they're gone. If you have to move on, they don't want you to move on with anything of value or substance. Because then they feel like they're losing something. They feel like they're missing out. So when they realise they can't mess with you, they're not just going to let you go without a fight. They will find other ways to get to you. They will try to affect whatever they see as a threat to themselves. Whatever makes them feel inferior and insignficiant. They will try to tamper with it. When they realise they can't mess with you, they're not thinking about you as a person. They're thinking about the benefits and conveniences they've lost as a result. And they're just doing damage control. They're trying to limit the damaging effects of losing you. By trying to destroy everything that is good about you. So then they don't have to feel like they've taken a loss. Because that's all that really matters to the narcissist. They're just trying to avoid that feeling of failure. That feeling of loss and regret.

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