top of page

THIS Triggers The Narcissist

A lot of people don't recognise this. But the truth is that a lot of times, the power is in the victim's hands. Because you are unknowingly triggering the narcissist. You are unknowingly causing them distress. By arousing feelings or memories that are associated with their past traumatic experiences. And by doing that, you are causing certain events or situations to happen or exist. But a lot of times, you are doing this unintentionally. And it is not happening as a direct result of something you have said or done. Because narcissists interpret things very differently. They have a post traumatic stress response. So their actions and behaviours are a response to their traumas. But they don't self-reflect or self-loathe like normal people do. They do feel worthless, inadequate and incompetent. But they don't want to reflect on those feelings or try to do better. Because they feel like it's a losing battle that they're never going to win. So instead, they try to trigger you. By deflecting their unhealed traumas on to you and watching you go through it. Which they use as a form of self-medication. To regulate their emotions.

So that they can feel a little bit better about themselves in that moment. Which is why you do need to be very careful. Because any little thing could set them off. To where they're wanting to lash out at you. And you will have noticed this whenever you questioned or confronted them on something. Whenever you threatened the illusion or the false character. Whenever you caught them doing something wrong. Because that will make them very mad. They don't like being exposed. That is one of their worst fears. And it is something that they hate the most. So if you try to expose them, they will deflect it on to you. They will say that you did something. They will make false accusations against you. Because they're already fully aware that they do a lot of things incorrectly. They already know that they're irresponsible. They know they've made mistakes. They just don't want to think about it. So instead, they will deflect it on to you. And they will bring up things from the past. Or they will blame someone else. Because it will set them off. It will make them go insane. They will become very anxious to challenge or avoid criticism. They will become self-justifying. As they try to protect and defend the illusion of their false self. Because it's a response to their childhood trauma.

So it puts them in fight or flight. And now they're coming after you. And it may seem as though they've developed these exceptional and extraordinary powers and abilities. This expertise and skilfulness. Where they're super fast and super strong. When the entire time that you were with them, they couldn't lift a finger. They couldn't even make the slightest effort to help you. But now they're going out of their way to take you down. They're pulling out all the stops. They're making a great effort and on a grand scale. And you may think that if only they did this with you in the beginning... You could have had something real. You could've developed something incredible. But you have remember that they're only doing this for themselves. They're not doing it to build something with you or with anyone else. It's intended to keep them alive. By protecting and defending their false image. Which is why they won't have that same energy towards seeing you at risk of danger or harm. They won't have those same instincts. Because that's only for themselves. That's just to protect the illusion. And when they're ready to go, they're ready to go. Their heart beats faster. They become more sensitive and aware. But this is just to protect the illusion. It's not to protect or save something valuable or important. It's just to protect themselves from being exposed. And it's actually self-destructive. It disables them. It stunts their growth.

Which is why, whenever they feel threatened or triggered, they attack. Even though you may not have even intended to do anything wrong. But something you said or did triggered this part of their brain to become activated and engaged. And it's always their emotions. They're never thinking logically. Which is why their behaviour is so out of control. There's no order or structure. It's just constant chaos and destruction. Because they're very damaged people. And they're unable to heal themselves. So all they can do is express this damage outwardly. By inflicting pain, suffering and misfortune upon you. Even though it really had nothing to do with you. Because these triggers were there long before you came on the scene. These were things that they developed in their childhood. While a lot of the things that happened to you were recent and the result of their actions and incompetency. Where they were deliberately intending to harm you. But you will know when they're triggered, because they're going to lash out at you. And they may do it overtly, or it may be something more under the radar. They may insult you and put you down. Or they may stalk you behind the scenes. But either way, it's designed to produce the same effect.

They're trying to deflect their pain and trauma on to you. Which is why if you try to expose them, they will feel triggered. Even if you didn't intend to expose them. Which is why it can be very difficult to negotiate with them. Because their feelings are always involved. And they will always be trying to protect and defend their false image. Which is why at times you can't even communicate with them. Because unlike a normal person, they're not looking to get a resolution. Because they enjoy the process of manipulating you and making you feel uncomfortable. And the last thing they want is to be held accountable for their actions. They don't want to change or grow. They want to stay the same. They're not looking to be better. So if you try to hold them accountable, they will try to find a way out of it. Because they're trying to move away from the pain. So they will lie or they will deny it. They will project and deflect. They will not let you hold them accountable for their actions. A lot of things trigger narcissists. But what they really hate is when they see you getting attention. When they see other people regarding you as interesting or important. Especially if it's in their presence. Which is ironic, because if there's one thing they don't want to do, it's giving attention where it is deserved. They hate to see people as being interesting or important.

Even though it may be the case. Because they're selfish. They want all the attention for themselves. They want everything to be coming to them. And they don't want to have to give anything to anyone. Because they're very insecure and they have low self-esteem. So they don't even have anything to give. They can't even give you a compliment. Which is quite funny when you think about it. Because you will always feel like you're walking on eggshells when you're around them. Where you have to be extremely cautious about your words and actions. Where you have to be very careful not to offend or upset them. But they will always try to twist it around on you. Because they're fully aware of everything they've done to you. So they try to make you hypersensitive. Because then they can feel more comfortable in comparison. If you're always on edge. But the irony is that they're often slighted by things that are of their own doing and making. Things that they created themselves. They will often identify with things that have nothing to do with them. Things that were never meant to mean anything to them. But they will make it about them. Because they're completely delusional. And they think they're very important. So it could just be something they invented inside their heads. Where they just assumed that it had something to do with them. Because they always have to be in control. And they're terrified of people no longer being in their favour or not supporting them. They're terrified of people doing things that they don't want them to do. They're terrified of situations developing that are outside of their control. Because they're very insecure. And they're fully aware that their reality is false.

So the last thing they want is for things to develop naturally. Because that would expose them. Which is why they have to be in direct opposition with anything that is true or real. Because that's the only way that they can get their way. And they constantly need to get their way. They're like big babies. They always need their arse's wiped and their nappies changed. Because otherwise they'll get a rash and they'll throw a temper tantrum. They'll act and do things without careful consideration of the possible consequences. They'll act recklessly and impulsively.They'll act quickly without thought or care. They'll move forcefully and rapidly. And with insufficient consideration. Because they've got a rash. They feel irritated. And they're trying to distract themselves from it. By focusing on you or something else. But whatever it is, you can always be sure that it's coming from within them. Because a lot of times, it's like they don't even see you. They have these tantrums that are always about themselves. These hour-long monologues. These disastrous breakdowns about nothing that has anything to actually do with you. This loss of control over their emotions. And it's like an itch they can't scratch. Because they have these insatiable desires. And yet they can't be satisfied. Because they're dependent on other people to fulfil them.

When that feeling of sustenance and support is meant to come from within. And it's why they're so easily triggered. It's not because of anything you've said or done to them. Although at times, that maybe a byproduct. Or it may be the thing that activates something that is already there. But these things were already ingrained in them a long time ago. When they failed to take back control of themselves following an episode or trauma. Instead, they made a decision to give other people power over them. By depending on them to regulate their emotions. Because they assumed that they were incapable of doing it themselves. Which is why they bully you. It's why they stalk and harass you. It's why they start smear campaigns and enforce flying monkeys. It's why they need other people to be on their side. And it's why, if they don't have these things, they will throw a tantrum. Because they're not getting their way. And these feelings that they have are more important to them than the actual truth. Because their feelings become the truth. Which is why they will even make up lies about you or steal from you. And if they're ever confronted, they will deny it. Because they have this itch. This rash. Which is more important to them. It defies all logic in their minds. It makes them go against the grain. It makes them want to be a distraction and an inconvenience to you. Because then it distracts them. And it can be very difficult to deal with this. Because any little thing could set them off.

Even this video is a trigger. Even the person that you are is a trigger. Your mere existence. Which is why they will try to destroy you. It's why they created this world. It's why they created a false character for you. It's designed to protect and defend themselves from being constantly triggered. And it is an incredible piece of work. It's like a magnificent piece of art, that has been carefully constructed with great enthusiasm and attention. But it's also a web of lies and deception, and they know it. Which is why they're so protective of it. It's why they have to brainwash you. And convince you into believing in things that are not true. It's why they're deliberately showing you that they're able to do things and get away with it. So that it leaves you unable to move or act. Until you feel completely beyond optimism or hope. And you feel like you're unable to defend yourself or act without hope. Because this is just what they have to do to sustain the illusion. They have to drain your physical energy and undermine your sense of self-worth. They have to gaslight, manipulate, and use emotionally controlling tactics to diminish you. And they have to automatically become like rapists. Where they're forcing you to do things that you don't willingly want to do. Because that's the only way they're going to have any control over you. It's the only way they're going to be able to sustain the illusion. But you can turn this around. By going in the opposite direction, instead of resisting. Because you were built like this from the very beginning. You were programmed to be this way from day one. And they're already aware of it.

They sense it. Which is why they try to tempt you into doing things that are unwise or foolish. Because they already know that you're going to resist. And then you will be handing your power over to them. Which is exactly what they want. Because they want you to hold out. They want you to refuse or accept to be changed by them. And it's why the last thing they want you to do is to change the dynamic. By accepting it and letting it go. Because then that would give you power over them. And it's the fear that gives them power over you. Which is why you just have to feel the fear and do it anyway. Because when you do that, you will free yourself. And you will be able to develop your own identity and sense of self. And you can put in some healthy boundaries. Because that will allow you to heal. And it will also protect you. Because by you taking your power back, it will trigger their narcissistic rage. And it will make them want to trigger you. So that they can switch around the power dynamic. And their role of interacting with you to influence you. But there needs to be boundaries in place. And you need to draw a line between what you will and will not tolerate. Because some things may not be ok for you. But of course, this will trigger them as well. They will be rash. They will throw a temper tantrum.

They will try to guilt and shame you. But you just have to remain strong. Because they will try to break you down. But you can still hold the power. By deciding to not give in to it. And by presenting your argument to justify your decision. But not by defending yourself. Because when you do that, you're just giving them your power. Which they will only misuse. Because they were never meant to have power. It's like giving a gun to a two year old child. They may only try to terrorise you. Because they're emotionally underdeveloped and they haven't learned empathy yet. So you just have to let them have their moment. Let them feel special. Be aware that you may be resisting. And how that may be causing you to give your power over to them. And recognise that you can still maintain healthy boundaries to protect yourself and your way of thinking. They're not going to like that, of course, because they want to break you. But you can still choose to stand strong by recognising your power over them. Because people don't build a carefully constructed illusion for nothing. They don't try to contain something that isn't worth anything. But at the same time, it doesn't really have anything to do with you. So don't let it get to your head. Recognise that they're just insecure. Validate yourself. And continue along your journey to greatness and success.

280 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All


bottom of page